Something Like Forever
by Bards of Bedlam
Summary: Ryo and Dee have broken up, and now they’re trying to work out the whole friendship after a breakup thing. But then an arsonist endangers Dee’s life and suddenly, breakups don’t seem so simple anymore and friendship is completely confusing.
1. A Rift Out Of Nowhere

Hi! Okay, this is the first fic I've ever written in which the perfect couple is broken up, so if I suck, please don't yell at me. I _suck_ at writing breakups and I love Ryo and Dee together, so this story will probably be personally delivered to Hell in a hand basket by one of you readers out there.

This will probably be a very short fic, since we have already established that I hate writing breakup stories. I don't really even know why I wrote it. It just came to me one day and now my muse won't leave me alone. She's _annoying_….like Tinker Bell without the skimpy outfit….

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**Chapter 1—A Rift Out Of Nowhere**

"I'm heading out," Dee said, poking his head around the doorway of Ryo's office. "You need any help before I take off?"

Ryo shook his head. "I….don't think so," he said quietly, as he continued to fill out papers. The stack of paperwork on his desk seemed to grow taller with every passing day, and for some reason, he just didn't care the way he used to. "I think I've got it covered."

"Okay. See ya tomorrow, then."

"See you."

Then Dee disappeared, and the second he was gone, Ryo's hand stopped moving. He stared at the empty doorway for a moment, contemplating going after Dee and trying to make things right, as always. And as always, his courage failed and he dropped his head into his hands.

It had been like this for three weeks now. The silence except when they talked about work. Each of them staring at the other when he wasn't looking. One of them always finding some excuse to leave the office when the silence became too awkward to ignore. Both of them still fumbling over the friends-after-the-breakup idea. Neither of them knowing what to say to fix what had happened.

What _had_ happened?

Ryo didn't know.

Dee knew, but he wasn't saying.

It was very awkward.

And it made Ryo want to scream.

He missed Dee.

Dee missed him.

It only made sense for them to be together.

So why _weren't_ they?

This was the path that Ryo's mind followed every single time he allowed himself to stop working. At his desk after Dee had left for the day, at home in his now frustratingly empty bed, every time there was silence and very little to distract him. Every single time Ryo was allowed to think, he analyzed the situation, and every time he came back to the same conclusion—he and Dee were meant to be together, and they weren't because of something Ryo had done.

Now if only he could figure out what that _was_….

Sighing, Ryo picked up his pen, finished the sheet he was working on, and placed it on top of the pile of finished papers that were waiting to be filed. Then he stood and got ready to leave, his mind already swamped with thoughts about the lonely night he faced. Bikky was a good kid but he wasn't Dee, and right now all Ryo wanted was Dee.

"Bikky, I'm home," Ryo called tiredly as he entered his apartment. "I know I'm usually hell-bent on making you home-cooked food every night, but how about we order out for pizza or something tonight? I'm beat…."

No answer.

"Bikky?" Ryo called again, hanging his coat up as he turned on the answering machine.

"Hey, Ryo," Bikky's voice said over the machine. "Carol called and asked me to come over for dinner, and I tried calling you at work but your cell must have been turned off or something."

Ryo fished his phone out of his pocket and, sure enough, it was dead.

"I didn't think you'd mind if I went over," Bikky continued. "I'll be home before ten. Carol's aunt said she didn't mind if you came over to have dinner with us, but I told her you weren't much for company lately. Try not to get too down-in-the-dumps tonight, and I'll see you when I get back. Bye."

Ryo sighed, the emptiness and silence of the apartment already getting to him. _Perfect_, he thought to himself.

The machine beeped, and another voice came over it. "Hey, Ryo, it's Drake. I just wanted to let you know that we got a full, signed confession on the Baker case. Also, I took some of that paperwork off your desk and I'm gonna help you and Dee with it. You looked like you could use the help."

Ryo smiled slightly. _Thank God he hasn't mentioned the thing between Dee and me._

"Oh, and Ryo….this thing between you and Dee…."

_Damn it_, Ryo thought.

"I don't know what's going on there, but it's making the whole precinct pretty damn uncomfortable. What happened? You guys were hot and heavy for a while there and now you haven't said more than ten words at a time to each other in three weeks. Me and the guys are starting to get a little freaked out."

_You and me both, Drake_.

"Well, anyway, I know it's none of my business, so I'll butt out. See you tomorrow."

Another beep, and Berkeley Rose's voice blared through the apartment. "Ryo, it's me. Listen, I heard something was going on between you and Dee, and I wanted to express my condolences."

_Yeah, right. You just want to invite me to dinner and then try to get me in bed._

"I did wonder, however, if you might like to come to dinner with me tomorrow night."

_I so called that one._

"I was supposed to have dinner with Diana, but she backed out at the last minute and now I've got reservations and no one to share them with. Call me if you'd like to come. It's purely a friendship thing, I promise. Completely innocent."

_Yeah right_.

A long beep signaled the end of the messages and Ryo leaned his forehead against the wall for a moment, trying to keep the anger and hurt inside from swelling up and driving him completely insane.

He couldn't remember ever feeling so alone.

XXX

Early the next morning, Ryo rolled over in his bed, smiling slightly as he tossed one arm over the empty space on the bed beside him. His eyes blinked open, and as he focused on that empty spot, his face fell. This was how he'd woken up every morning since Dee broke up with him.

Sighing, Ryo dragged himself out of bed and went to knock on Bikky's door. "Time to get up, Biks," he called tiredly. "What do you want for breakfast?"

A mumbled, completely unintelligible and incoherent reply came from the other side of the door, where Bikky had pulled his pillow over his head and moved deeper under the covers in an effort to disprove the fact that there was sunlight shining through his window. "Leave me alone."

"Pancakes it is, then. Good choice."

"I hate you."

"Hate me all you want, as long as you're doing it in a classroom. Up!"

Fifteen minutes later, Bikky stumbled out of his room, his hair disheveled and his eyes half closed. Ryo was in the kitchen, setting the table for breakfast. "It's six thirty in the morning, Ryo."

"Exactly, school starts in forty-five minutes, and you need to be up."

"Not for another half hour."

"Bikky, stop complaining and sit down," Ryo snapped.

Bikky blinked at him, forcing his eyes open the rest of the way. "Okay…." He sat down at the table, snatching a glass of water and downing it in an effort to wake up. "You're crabby," he stated after a moment.

"I just didn't sleep well."

"You're crabby every morning lately."

"I'm….just working a lot, is all."

"Working or thinking about Dee when you're _supposed _to be working?"

Ryo didn't say anything as he set a plate of pancakes, bacon, and eggs on the table in front of Bikky. He then filled his own plate and sat at the table across from his son.

"Ryo, you still haven't told me what's going on with you two."

"Nothing's going on."

"It's been three weeks since I've heard you mention him. Did you two have a fight?"

Silence.

"Ryo?"

"_Eat_."

"….Fine."

The kitchen fell silent as the two continued to eat, with Bikky looking very angry and Ryo mentally kicking himself.

"We broke up," Ryo said at last.

"….Oh."

"Well, _we_ didn't. He did."

"You're kidding."

"I wish I was."

"But….he's obsessed with you."

"Apparently not, because he broke up with me."

"When?"

"….Three weeks ago."

"You waited _three weeks_ to tell me?"

"….Sorry."

"No, it's fine, I just…. _Why_?"

Ryo shrugged. "I have no clue."

"Did you two have a fight or something?"

"No….that would actually make some _sense_. He just broke up with me."

"Oh….but…."

"Look, Biks, I really don't want to talk about this right now, okay? Finish eating and get dressed. I'll drive you to school."

They ate the rest of the meal in silence, and then Bikky stood and headed towards his room.

"Bikky?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry."

Bikky smiled slightly. "Don't worry about it."

XXX

By the time he got to work, Ryo was in a very bad mood. His disposition was not improved when Rose came up to him before he had even taken off his coat and asked if Ryo had thought about accepting his dinner invitation.

"No, I haven't, sir," Ryo replied shortly, hanging his coat on the rack by the door and sitting at his desk. "But I don't think I can come. I'm having dinner with Bikky tonight. Like I do _every night_," he added, hoping Rose would take the hint.

He did, and when Ryo was alone in the office, he dropped his head onto his hands and sighed. "My God, it's only eight o'clock…." he muttered to himself. "How am I ever gonna make it through today?"

The last three weeks had been nothing but pure torture for Ryo. He had been neglecting most of his work in favor of staring into space and trying to figure out what had happened to break his life apart. His career was suffering and he knew it, but he couldn't find himself to care. He just hoped no one else had noticed.

At that moment, JJ stuck his head around the doorway. "Chief wants to see you, Ryo."

Apparently they had.

Sighing, Ryo stood up. "Okay. Thanks, JJ."

Down in the chief's office, Ryo grabbed a chair and sank into it. He said nothing—just stared at the old man and waited for him to say something.

"What's going on with you lately, MacLean?"

Ryo shrugged.

"You're acting like Dee."

"At least one of us is," Ryo muttered, half to himself.

"What?"

"Oh….nothing."

The Chief sighed. "If it were anyone else I would be screaming at them right about now."

"So why aren't you?"

"Because I'm smart enough to know that something's going on between you and Laytner and it's throwing you off your game."

"Christ, not you too…."

"Huh?"

"Nothing, never mind."

The Chief sighed again. "Look, McLean, you've got to get your act together. I don't know what's going on, but you'd sure as hell better fix it before you get fired."

"Yes, sir."

"Good. Now I've got a case for you…."

Someone moved past the door.

"LAYTNER!!!!" the Chief half-barked, half-yelled. "GET IN HERE!!!"

Dee poked his head back around the doorway, saw Ryo sitting in the chair in front of the Chief's desk, and remained where he was. "Yeah?"

"GET IN HERE!!!"

"Why do you always yell at _me_?" Dee asked, moving over to pull up a chair next to Ryo and noting how Ryo avoided his eyes. That hurt a little, but Dee shoved the hurt away and sat down. "What do you want?"

The Chief shoved a file across the desk at Dee. "New case. You and McLean. Arsonist. Read. Memorize. Solve. Go away."

"….Right…."

They got up and went into the hall in silence.

"So…." Dee said as they walked down to Ryo's office. "I guess we should…."

"Read…."

"Yeah…."

They hadn't been assigned a case together since the breakup. They were still partners, but it had been mostly paperwork that they'd had to do, and they could do that separately. Now they were being thrown together to solve a case….

_Damn it. This is gonna be awkward._

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So there it is. Basically just so you know what Ryo's life has been like since the breakup. Like it said, this story will probably be very short. I'm sorry if this chapter seemed pointless, and it probably was, but I wanted to write it so you'd all know how much Ryo misses Dee.


	2. The Case

Okay, I can't decide if I want to drag this whole thing out for a long time or end it quick… What should I _do_? I don't know… Okay, I'm just gonna wing it and see how it turns out.

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**Chapter 2—The Case**

"This is just….disturbing."

Ryo smiled slightly at Dee's disgusted tone. "Welcome to the real world. Oh my God!" he yelped suddenly, dropping a stack of pictures on the desk. "That's _disgusting_!"

Dee reached over and grabbed the picture. "Ew."

The two had been in here for the past hour, looking over the case file the Chief had given them. They had spent the day finishing up the rest of their paperwork and then meeting in Dee's office to start studying the new case, and they were now devoting their entire attention to it and only it.

At first, it had looked like your average arsonist case—vandalism, tossing a bomb here and there, burning buildings—just burning for the sake of burning, vandalizing for the sake of vandalizing. But as they got deeper into the case file, things got more and more disturbing.

It seemed that the culprit had turned from meaningless destruction of public property to killing small children—_orphans_—by stabbing, shooting, or burning them alive. He raped the girls before he killed them and made the boys watch.

He was a sick and twisted bastard, and no one knew his motives.

The only good thing was that a little of the awkwardness was starting to fade between Ryo and Dee.

Ryo watched Dee's face grow more and more disturbed as he flipped through the pictures. He smiled slightly; Dee never changed.

"Gah!" Dee suddenly yelped, jumping out of his chair and dropping the pictures onto the desk. "That was a _human_?"

Ryo blinked at him, and started to laugh. He didn't really know why, but soon he was completely breathless with mirth. Dee stared at him, completely nonplussed, and his expression only made Ryo laugh harder. Watching him, Dee felt himself start to smile, and before long he was laughing, too. And for that one, shining moment, they were together again. Ryo and Dee, the dynamic duo. The dream team. _Together_.

At last, their laughter started to fade, leaving them with aching sides and very little breath to work with.

"Why….are we….laughing?" Ryo wheezed, trying to draw oxygen into his lungs and failing miserably.

"I don't….know," Dee responded, similarly out of breath. "You started it."

"God, it feels good to laugh," Ryo said as Dee returned to his seat. "It's been three weeks since I've cracked a grin."

Dee's smile faltered, and he said nothing. And just like that, they were once again Ryo and Dee, ex-couple.

"Are....we ever gonna....y'know....talk about it?" Ryo asked quietly, after several minutes passed in silence except for the shuffling of papers and the squeak of the rolling chair's wheels as Dee moved it back and forth between the desk and the filing cabinet.

Dee knew he wasn't talking about the case, and it didn't take a genius to figure out what he _was_ talking about. He shook his head, choosing to remain silent. He didn't _want_ to talk about it.

Ryo sighed inwardly, but nodded and went back to the file. "Hey, what's this?"

"….Looks like a riddle."

"Hmm…."

And that was all he said. For the next few minutes, Ryo studied the piece of paper he'd just found in the file, only breaking the silence when he was certain he had something to say. "I think it _is_ a riddle," he concluded at last. "It doesn't seem to make any kind of sense at all, but I _think _it's telling us what he plans to do next."

"Great, this case will be a breeze, then" Dee replied, taking a cigarette out of his pocket and lighting it. "We'll just hunt down Sandra Bullock, send her off to the Miss America pageant, and hit a bar for some late-night, down-and-dirty celebrations of questionable morality. Case closed. Let's go home." Then, blinking, he looked up, realizing what he'd just said. "I mean…our homes. I'll go to mine and…you'll go to…yours… Want a cigarette?"

Ryo decided that the best course was to pretend he didn't notice the sudden tension in the room, and he did just that. "Go down to the lobby if you're gonna smoke."

"This is _my_ office."

"And you're not supposed to be smoking in here."

"…Goody-goody."

"Addict."

After a few more minutes of silence, with Ryo stealing glances at Dee when the black-haired man wasn't looking, and vice versa, Ryo said, "Okay, we're not getting any work done with both of us in here. Why don't you go home? It's getting late."

"What about you?"

"They're probably already working on this down in Intelligence but I wanna take a crack at it. Maybe I can solve it before they do."

"Don't you need to be getting home to the ape?"

"He's staying at Carol's this weekend, and I don't really feel like going home yet. You go on, though."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, go on. I'm fine here. I got my coffee to drink and a riddle to solve. I could be happy here for a _very_ long time."

"Okay, if you're sure… Freak."

"Dee, _go away_."

XXX

Hours later, Ryo still sat at his desk. His coffee cup was nearly empty for the sixth time, and he showed no signs of leaving anytime soon.

Ryo rested his head on his hands and sighed. He didn't know how much more of this he could take. He had decided he needed a break from trying to solve the riddle, and had instead turned to trying to figure out who was committing the crimes, and why.

He _needed_ to throw himself wholeheartedly into solving this case. Otherwise he would fall to thinking about Dee, and if he spent any more time on _that_ particular subject, he would surely drive himself insane.

After calling everyone he thought might know something about the case and getting absolutely no leads, he had pulled out all the files he could find about similar cases in the past. There had only been a handful of them in the past twenty years, but they were all there. And at last, after about two hours of reading through the files, Ryo thought he might have something. A name. Well, a last name. In every case like this one—with the culprit starting with simple arson and then turning to killing children—the culprit had the last name "Chintzier." Not a surname one saw every day.

He looked over at the clock, which read twelve-thirty. Dee was probably asleep by now. He would just have to talk to him about it tomorrow. But there was a lot he could do _now_ with this last name.

Going over to the computer, Ryo did a web search on the Chintzier family tree and found that the family dated back to a famous 1920's serial killer who was known for the unbelievably painful and drawn-out deaths he brought to children in orphanages all over the east coast. No motive other than insanity was ever found and, after escaping from three different mental health facilities and showing little to no improvement in his psychological condition, the man had been jailed for life. He died in prison only a few years after he was brought in.

Perhaps now his family was continuing his legacy? But then, why had Ryo never heard of this before? Why had the others not gained fame?

Ryo spent a few minutes on this question before shaking his head and, deciding that the answer to that question would probably have no bearing on the case, went back to the more urgent tasks at hand.

After having concluded the answer to his first question—_why_—he now began to look for the _who_. He went to the bottom of the family tree, and (though the situation certainly didn't call for it) smiled slightly. There was only one member of the Chintzier family left alive today.

At the very bottom of the page, Ryo at last found what he was looking for—a name. _Gregory Chintzier._ It wasn't much. But it was a start. He had a suspect.

Unfortunately, there was no evidence, nothing solid to obtain an arrest warrant with. But he would worry about that later. Right now a lead—_any _lead—would do.

Now all that was left was to track down this man's address and solve the riddle. Deciding the address could wait—going alone was just asking for trouble, anyway—he decided the riddle was his biggest priority.

Three hours and five cups of coffee later, Ryo tossed his pen down in triumph. In front of him were two pieces of paper--the riddle, and his interpretation of its meaning.

_Orphanage of the Sacred Heart_.

There was no time, no specifics, but Ryo knew almost for certain that the Orphanage of the Sacred Heart would be attacked in some way, sometime soon. And now that he knew that, he, the Chief, Dee, and possibly Commissioner Rose could formulate a game plan. One thing was sure—under _no_ circumstances could anyone be allowed to go into that orphanage.

Ryo reached over and grabbed the phone, then opened the phonebook on his desk and dialed the number of the orphanage. No one answered, so he left a message for the head nun (it was a Catholic orphanage) telling her to call him immediately when she woke up, left his home phone number _and_ his work number just to be on the safe side, and hung up. He then found his suspect's address and phone number, scribbled them down on the sheet with the solution to the riddle, and finally felt like he could actually get some sleep.

Sighing in relief, Ryo organized the papers and placed everything in a stack on the corner of the desk. Then he started to get up, and at that moment , he realized just how exhausted he was. Before he even thought about what he was doing, he folded his arms in front of him on the desk, dropped his head onto them, and closed his eyes…

XXX

Little did he know that the entire time he had been working on this case, Dee had been calling every contact he had ever made in the police business and in his entire life trying to solve this case. He didn't want to have to go to work tomorrow.

And a small part of him was ashamed to admit that as serious and heartbreaking as this case was, he just _couldn't_ face work the next day. Being with Ryo like that….it was too much. It was starting to wear on him.

He didn't know how long he could keep this happy-go-lucky, smile-and-stay-friends-after-the-breakup routine going…

XXX

The next thing Ryo knew, a hand was shaking his shoulder. "Ryo?" a soft voice asked.

Ryo stirred, but he refused to open his eyes. "Go 'way…"

"Ryo, have you been here all night?"

"Huh…?"

"Ryo, wake up…"

"Don't wanna…"

"RYO!"

At that, Ryo jumped, opening his eyes. "WHAT?!"

"You gotta get up."

Ryo rubbed his eyes. "Huh? …JJ? What are you doing here? Is Dee in yet?"

"Dee…took the day off. The week, actually. He had some vacation days stored up and he's spending them at the orphanage with Sister Maria. Rose is after his ass already, and so's the Chief. I thought he would have told you."

"Mmm…nope. What time is it?"

"Ten-thirty."

"WHAT?!"

"…Yeah. It's okay, Ryo. You looked like you needed some sleep. I'm sure Chief won't be too mad, and— Ryo? Where are you going? Ryo?"

But JJ's words fell on deaf ears; Ryo had already grabbed the stack of papers on the desk and rushed out of the room.

"…Ryo?"

XXX

By the end of the day, a plan was formed. The orphanage had been called, and officers would be posted around its perimeter to keep anyone from entering. Until some rock-solid evidence was found of his guilt, Greg Chintzier could not be legally brought in for questioning, but officers would be placed near his home and tail him wherever he went.

Secretly, of course.

Ryo couldn't get hold of Dee no matter how hard he tried, and he tried to call Sister Maria to have her deliver a message when she saw him, but she wasn't answering her phone, either. He had gone over to Dee's house, but Dee hadn't been home, so he'd gone to Sister Maria's orphanage, and no one had been there, either.

So Ryo went to finish making the arrangements for finishing up the case, and told himself not to worry. He would just have to keep trying to get hold of Dee and get him back on the job. But then again, Ryo seemed better able to concentrate when Dee wasn't there. Maybe it would be best if he let Dee have his vacation time and just…focused on solving the case.

At least the case wasn't Dee.

And _anything_ was better than concentrating on Dee.

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So there you go. Ryo's got the case solved, after a fashion—he just needs evidence. And an arrest. And a confession. And Dee.

Tune in next chapter! Please? And in the meantime…REVIEW!!! YAY!!!

**NOTE:** Yeah, I suck at writing this whole "criminal investigation" thing. I don't know the procedure, I don't know how riddles are solved, I don't know how they do arrests, I don't know _anything_. My only knowledge comes from the _Fake_ series and repeated viewings of _Miss Congeniality_. What do you people _want_ from me? Please be nice and don't point out all the mistakes I probably made about police procedure in this chapter! Oh, and if there are any readers out there who are police officers or are related to police officers…. DON'T KILL ME! I'M INNOCENT! I AM INNOCENT IN MY BLISSFUL IGNORANCE!

**ANOTHER NOTE:** I know it seems like Ryo solved the whole thing really, really fast, but I needed him to so that I could get on to the _good_ stuff! So please don't be mad if you think things moved too fast in this chapter!

**OH, AND… **_Chintzier_ actually means something along the lines of "gaudy, trashy, stingy, or miserly." I thought it was a fun word, so…yeah…it's the bad guy's last name! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!

Yeah, sorry, I'm hyper…


	3. The Longest Day

**Chapter 3—The Longest Day**

**NYPD 27****th**** Precinct**

**10:00 a.m.**

That morning, JJ and Drake were in the filing room, filing the paperwork that just never seemed to leave any of them alone nowadays. The two didn't do much talking, but worked in silence. It was sort of awkward, but they tried desperately to cover that up by pretending nothing had happened between them. But it had.

About a week before, JJ had kissed Drake.

It had been a complete accident. Drake had come over to talk about a case with his partner and found JJ crying on his couch. Naturally, he had been concerned—JJ always seemed to be the happy-go-lucky one. So he's gone over to sit next to the man on the couch and asked him what was wrong, and JJ had replied that he felt guilty over Dee and Ryo's breakup, because Dee just wasn't the same anymore and JJ felt that he himself had caused the whole thing by wishing so hard for Dee to be back on the market. Then he talked about how he didn't feel the same way about Dee anymore. "I mean," he had said, "I still love him. I think part of me always will. But…I don't want to be _with_ him anymore… And now he and Ryo are broken up and he's heartbroken over it and I can't help feeling like I caused it all by wishing for it."

This had been followed by Drake trying to comfort JJ—very awkwardly, as Drake wasn't good with words and was even worse at comforting people. But he must have done _something_ right, because the next thing he knew, JJ was kissing him.

JJ had pulled quickly away and blushed very deeply, and Drake had just stared at JJ for a moment before jumping up and running out of the house.

And then they'd pretended like it never happened and now things were just…_weird_ between them.

JJ had no idea why he was so embarrassed. After all, he'd never had any problem running up behind Dee and grabbing him for a kiss. But with Drake…it felt different. Not _wrong_, but different. It felt like…something. It felt like there was potential there, between him and Drake. And that freaked JJ out a little, because Drake was _so_ not gay. He went from woman to woman to woman and had never once thrown JJ a glance, but…

Well, there was no use thinking about it, JJ concluded. _I couldn't have him even if I wanted him_…_and I'm not sure I do_…_ Do I?_

At that moment, JJ's thoughts were interrupted by the sound of Drake's voice. He shook his head slightly. "Hmm…? I'm sorry, what?"

"I _asked_ what's up with Dee and Ryo nowadays," Drake replied conversationally. "They getting back together anytime soon?"

"Not as far as I can tell," JJ replied. "Hand me that stack?"

Drake did so, and JJ took the papers as he continued talking. "I heard the Commissioner asked Ryo to dinner already."

"Is he going?"

"I don't _think_ so. I hope not—then all the chances of him getting back with Dee would be shot straight to hell."

"I thought that was what you wanted."

"…Nope. I've given up on Dee Laytner. He'll never be mine, I'll never be his, and I don't wanna make a big thing out of it. And besides, my ego's all fixed up and happy because at least I can say with _complete_ confidence that out of Ryo and I, _I'm_ the better sharpshooter."

Drake laughed. "If you say so."

"Drake!"

Another laugh. "I'm just messing with you."

"So what do _you_ think of the whole Ryo-Dee situation?"

"What do I think? I think those two won't stay apart forever. It's one of those sickening made-for-each-other things. Besides, Dee's in _love_."

"I've never seen Dee in love," JJ replied. "It's interesting."

He had discovered recently that he could now talk about Dee and his relationships without any of his old feelings popping up to strangle him—well, not as many as before. It was a nice feeling. Strange…_unbelievably_ confusing…but nice.

Drake came over to place some papers in the filing cabinet JJ was leaning against as he flipped through a stack of paperwork on a clipboard. He laughed. "If I know Dee, he probably thanked God every day for a month after he and Ryo got partnered up."

"Probably still does."

"Aww, that's so _sweet_," Drake teased.

"Now, now, don't mock," JJ replied without any real heat to his words.

"But it's so much _fun_." Drake grinned. "You dropped some papers."

"…Oh…" JJ bent to gather up the stuff he'd dropped and stood again, only to find his own face inches from Drake's. Drake was still chuckling, but the smile faded from his face as he stared at JJ. It was like they were under a spell, or in one of those really corny romance films depicting a couple's first kiss. (Or in this case, _second_ kiss.) Then JJ leaned in to give Drake a soft, hesitant kiss, just like he had last week. Drake just stood there for a moment, letting it happen. Then, quite suddenly, he was kissing back. Slowly, he brought his hands up to JJ's shoulders and pulled the other man a little closer.

Drake had kissed plenty of girls before, but kissing JJ was just…different. His lips felt warmer somehow. Part of his mind whispered to him that this was wrong, that things weren't supposed to happen this way, but he pushed the little voice away and pulled JJ even closer. After a moment, however, that voice became too loud to ignore, and he pulled away from JJ very suddenly.

JJ stared at him. "Drake, I…"

"Don't worry about it. I have to…go…do something…somewhere that's…else…" And with that, Drake fled the room.

The fact that JJ had kissed him wasn't what scared him. But the fact that he himself had returned the kiss….that _terrified_ him.

XXX

JJ just stood there in the filing room for a long while, trying to sort out what had happened. He had kissed Drake. Drake had kissed him. JJ had felt his heart soar. Drake had fled in terror.

That couldn't be a good sign.

Sighing, JJ finished filing the paperwork and went to find Drake, only to have Ted tell him that the brand new and very confusing object of his affections had snatched a pack of cigarettes and moved off the premises at hyper speed to smoke in peace.

So JJ had gone to Dee's office, and that was when he found Ryo asleep at Dee's desk, which the blond had never thought about moving from the night before.

XXX

The Orphanage of the Sacred Heart

**11:00 a.m.**

Dee knocked at the back door of the orphanage with his free hand, his other being occupied with trying to keep hold of the giant cardboard box he held under his arm. He shifted back and forth from foot to foot out of habit, being currently hyped up on caffeine.

After a few moments, a young woman came to the door, holding a tiny girl in her arms. She smiled in welcome—she had a very nice smile, Dee noted. "Can I help you?"

"Are you Cecily Carlisle?"

The woman nodded. "That's me. What can I do for you?"

"I'm Dee Laytner. Sister Maria sent me over. She was cleaning out the orphanage and she threw some stuff in a box—clothes, toys, books, y'know—and she wanted me to bring it over and see if you could use any of it before she donated it to the charity drive."

"Oh, how nice of her! Come in, and I'll see if there's anything in there we can use."

"Thanks."

"I have to say, this is a surprise," Cecily said as she led Dee down several hallways, past a room where some children were playing and a couple of rooms filled with beds, and into a large, deserted kitchen. "You can put that box by the door. Sister Maria never mentioned she was sending anyone over."

"Really? She said she'd call."

"Well, I'm sure she's busy with all those children, and she did mention that she was taking them all out today."

"That must be why she didn't call. She probably forgot. She never forgets anything, though… Especially spilling juice on her carpet…she _still_ hasn't let me forget that…"

"When did you do that?"

"When I was nine."

Cecily laughed. "Want some coffee?"

Dee looked up with a grateful smile as he set his load next to the door leading outside from the kitchen. "You have no idea how much."

"Well come one over here and get some. So, I'm sorry, who are you?"

"Dee Laytner."

"Oh…and how do you know Sister Maria?"

"I grew up in her orphanage, actually. Until I had to go out and get a life."

Another laugh, and Cecily handed Dee a cup of coffee. "Go have a seat while I look through this stuff."

Dee nodded and went to sit at the table. For the next few minutes, the two just sat there, making small talk and such, and after about fifteen minutes, Cecily stood up. "I think we can use _all_ of this, if Sister Maria is really willing to give it to us."

"She said you'd say that, and she said to _make_ you take it."

Cecily laughed. "That sounds about right."

Dee drained the last of his coffee and stood. "Okay, I'm sure you're busy, so I'll just…get out of your way…"

He was almost to the door when she spoke. "Dee?"

He turned around to smile at her. "Yeah?"

"Do you want to stay? I've got a little cleaning up to do, and…it'd be nice to have some help. I know you just met me and cleaning probably isn't high on your list of priorities, but if you're not doing anything…"

"I'm not. And I'd be glad to help."

Cecily smiled happily. "All right. Thank you. Follow me, then. Come meet the children."

Dee watched her walk away, and grinned to himself as she left the room. _Score one for Dee Laytner_, he thought appreciatively.

In the room they had passed before—the one full of kids—Cecily pointed out the children and told Dee their names, all of which Dee tried very hard to remember. Learning the kids' names and getting them to trust him would help him win _Cecily's_ trust, which could only help Dee approach his goal.

A plan was already forming in his mind.

XXX

Fifth Street Estates Apartment 62

**4:25 p.m.**

In his little apartment, Gregory Chintzier carefully finished packing his last stash. He had just returned from an orphanage run by a Sister Maria Lane—it had been empty, which had only helped.

This was it. This was the day he would create his own legacy. Not like the rest of his family….they had run out on their duty to their family.

But not this time. This time, he would do his part to ensure that as much of the next generation as possible was wiped out. Starting with the New York City orphanages.

Only one more left to take care of.

XXX

**NYPD 27****th**** Precinct**

**7:10 p.m.**

Ryo was tired. He was exhausted. He could hardly think straight anymore.

But he was happy.

It had taken him most of the day to put together teams to tail Chintzier and guard the Orphanage of the Sacred Heart, but tomorrow, everything would be in place. Armed officers dressed as civilians were already heading over to Chintzier's house, and tomorrow another team would be dispatched to the orphanage to keep anyone from going in or out of it unless they had a very good reason or unless an arrest was made. Until then, they all just had to sit tight.

He had been trying to call Dee all day, but he wasn't answering his home phone or his cell, and his apartment had been empty when Ryo had gone over there. He couldn't get hold of Sister Maria, either, so he had no idea where Dee was or what was happening in the world. At last, he gave up trying, figuring he'd call Dee as early as possible the next morning and brief him on what was happening.

With a little mental sigh, Ryo returned to his office to do yet another stack of paperwork.

Meanwhile, in his office, the Chief was listening to a very strange message on his machine….

Chief, just an update on the new case. I've cleared out all the orphanages in the New York City area. There are bombs set to go off in every one of them. I'm wrapping up your new case right now. And, sir…I promise, I'm only doing what I have to do.

XXX

**Lady Of Faith Orphanage**

**7:15 p.m.**

Sister Madrilène, the woman who ran the Lady of Faith Orphanage, had just finished settling the children in to do their homework when her phone rang. Smiling at the little boy whose hand clung to her skirt, she gently uncurled his fingers and set him on the bed to be read to by an older girl. Then she stood and went to the phone.

"Lady of Faith Orphanage. How may I help you?"

"…You have to get out of the orphanage."

Naturally, the woman looked shocked. "Excuse me? Who is this? We do _not_ appreciate prank callers here, Mr.—?"

"I can't give you my name, and it isn't a prank. Just…trust me. There are at least fifteen bombs ready to go off in that building at exactly seven-thirty, and one of them is most likely right under your feet. I don't know how they got in there and I don't know how or why they got into the other orphanages, but I do know that the man who planted them will stop at nothing to wipe out the next generation. All the other orphanages have already been cleared out and have been empty since six this morning, but I only just managed to get through to you. You have to take the children and go. Now. And if you don't believe me, call the NYPD 27th precinct. They'll tell you the same. You have thirteen minutes to get out, I suggest you hurry. I don't want to hurt you…I want to help you. Leave the orphanage. _Now_."

Then the caller hung up.

Sister Madrilène stared at the phone in her hand for a moment, then went to move the children quickly out of the orphanage.

XXX

Orphanage of the Sacred Heart

**7:20 p.m.**

Dee looked nervously out the window as though he were searching for something. It was getting late…

"What's the matter, Mr. Laytner?"

"…Nothing. So…your daughter seemed sweet. In that…brief moment that I actually got to meet her.

Cecily smiled. "She's the best. She likes to play alone, though. Usually upstairs in one of the bedrooms." She looked up at Dee, her smile widening. "She liked you, though. I could tell."

"Ah…"

Dee stood nervously and went to the window. He had to fight not to sigh—there was a dark figure coming slowly up the road. _Time to go_.

"Cecily, if I tell you something you may not want to believe, do you promise to trust me?"

"…Maybe…"

He turned to look at her. "You have to take the kids out of here."

"…What?"

"I don't have time to explain but in about a minute and a half a man is going to come in here to kill your children, and you'd better be damn sure you're nowhere near here when he does. Take them out the back—he's most likely gonna climb through one of the windows. _Go_!"

Cecily had been staring at him, but now she jumped into action. Her mind cleared itself up as she realized that her children were in danger. She didn't know why she trusted this man. She just…did.

So she gathered the children up and was just about to rush them out the back door when she turned suddenly. "Robin!"

"I'll get her, go!"

"But—"

"_Go_!"

"O_kay_!"

Then Cecily herded the children—most of them looking scared and confused—out the door and Dee bounded upstairs. In the first bedroom he came to, he found a little girl about six years old sitting on the bed, clutching a teddy bear and coloring in a coloring book. He went over to her quickly. "Robin?"

"Hi, Mr. Dee," she replied cheerfully.

"Robin, I'm going to tell you something, and you have to trust me," Dee said, speaking very quickly. "It's very important, so listen."

The girl looked up, giving him her full attention.

Dee took Robin and lifted her, placing her by the window. "A man is coming to hurt you, Robin, and if we're going to get away from him you have to do _exactly_ as I tell you."

The little girl's eyes widened, but she nodded.

Dee had just finished telling her what to do when he heard it—someone had opened a window in the room next to them and climbed in. And about ten seconds later, the door opened.

The man who entered was just…well, he _looked_ the part of a serial killer, for certain. He spotted Dee standing by the open window, with Robin partially hidden behind him, and he…_leered_.

"You're Greg Chintzier," Dee said. It wasn't a question.

The man stared at him, sizing him up, and then a small, slightly insane smile touched his face. "The one and only. You're that NYPD cop who left the warning on my machine."

"…Yep."

"The warning about what would happen if I bomb the orphanages."

"That's me."

"Well it's too late, Detective Laytner. It's all in motion."

"Maybe it is. Maybe it isn't."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"What do you think it means?"

Chintzier sighed, and chuckled. "I'm in no mood to play games tonight, Mr. Laytner. I've already placed a bomb in here—several of them, in fact. And they'll go off in about a two minutes, give or take."

"That part I knew. What I don't get is…why? You blew up those buildings, you raped those girls, you _killed children_. Don't deny it."

"Oh, I wouldn't dream of it, Mr. Laytner. It's a family obligation thing. We date back, we Chintziers."

"Yep, all the way back to the 1920s serial killer Chintzier."

"…You really _did _do your homework, didn't you?"

"Always do."

And then, as if he'd suddenly become possessed, Dee took two steps forward and threw a punch that sent Chintzier reeling. In two more steps he was back at the window, and he picked the little girl up and tossed her out the window. She landed in a heap on the ground, but it wasn't terribly high up, and the girl jumped to her feet and started to run, not looking back.

Chintzier had just managed to regain his balance after the blow, and he was just in time to see Robin go out the window. He stared, and a muscle worked in his jaw, but his anger merely simmered beneath the surface. "You don't really think you can save them all, do you, Mr. Laytner? You cleared out this place, I take it. But the others…."

"The others are empty, too. I cleared them out this morning."

"…You…?"

"And now you'll be going to jail for a crime you weren't even able to commit. But there's the other crimes to take into consideration, too. The rape, the beatings, the arson, the destruction of public property, the illegal ownership of destructive weaponry…"

"How did you…?"

"Don't underestimate the power of friends in low places."

The man looked like he was about to explode with sheer rage, but then he calmed down, very suddenly. "But of course, my arrest would depend on you getting out of here alive."

Dee laughed. "Oh, I'm not a _total_ moron and I have no delusions about what a man can live through and what he can't. I know I'm not making it out alive. But that girl I just tossed out the window? She's wearing a wire."

There was complete silence for a moment. "You gave her a…?"

"What, you don't think I'm a complete idiot, do you? I managed to get you here. Of course, you may not be going to jail today after all."

"…What?"

"You may be going down right here with me in three….two….one…."

And then Chintzier made a mad dash for the window and Dee dove for the nearest possible cover as the entire building burst into a ball of white-hot flame.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Okay I know the beginning of this chapter probably had everyone going, "What the crap… JJ and Drake? When did that happen?" It was my way of setting part of the stage for a future story (see _Dead Men Tell No Tales_).

And I know the whole thing with Dee solving it all and the guy coming was really sudden, but it was supposed to be that way. I wanted everyone to think that Dee was just blowing off the case, making his completely coming through in the end a bit of a surprise.

So don't kill me for this chapter, please!


	4. The Reason

**Chapter 4—The Reason**

Berkeley got the message not long after the explosion happened.

It wasn't a very detailed message—all it said was that Dee's I.D. had been found in his pocket and that he was being loaded into an ambulance as the message was left.

And having no idea how to tell Ryo—or where to find him—Berkeley called JJ's office instead.

XXX

JJ couldn't remember ever feeling this exhausted. He had finally managed to hunt down Drake and drag him kicking and screaming back to the precinct, and now they both sat in JJ's office; Drake looked acutely uncomfortable.

"I told you, just forget it," Drake said, making to stand up.

JJ grabbed his arm. "Drake…"

"No touching," Drake replied. "Touching very dangerous right now." His voice carried no anger—he wasn't angry. He was just at a complete loss when it came to handling the situation.

Well…Drake didn't actually _handle_ situations, except in the physical way. When something happened between him and whatever girl he was dating, he usually just coaxed her into bed and the whole issue blew over the next morning. But this course of action clearly was not an option with JJ, so they just sat there looking awkward.

"Drake, I'm _sorry_, okay? I just…I don't know what's going on between us."

"_Nothing_." This time, JJ let Drake walk away, and he walked to the other side of the room to fiddle absently with the lock on his filing cabinet. "Nothing's happening between us, JJ! We're friends, and partners, and that's it."

"But…you kissed me back…" JJ replied softly. Drake couldn't remember ever hearing his partner's voice sound so small.

"It means _nothing_, JJ. I'm a _really_ lonely guy with little to no self-control, and that's _all_ I am. I'm _not_ gay and I'm _not_ interested in you that way."

"Cleopatra, queen of denial."

"What's _that_ supposed to mean?"

JJ sighed loudly and dropped his face into his hands before lifting it and speaking again. "Look, there's _something_ between us. I know there is, and I think there has been for awhile. It may be crazy, it may be completely irrational, but it's there. I was always too stupid to realize it because I was so obsessed with Dee, and now you don't _want_ to realize it because you're so thoroughly convinced that you could never be anything but a straight, lonely, brainless, pathetic moron without a clue—"

"I _am_ a lonely, brainless, pathetic moron without a clue."

"So you admit you're not straight."

"I—no! JJ!"

"Drake, stop it. I know I'm not the person you had in mind for a relationship, but there's _something_ happening here, with us. There's potential. And whether or not we decide to start something, we've _got_ to put a stop to this crazy pattern we seem to have gotten ourselves into."

"JJ, I'm _not_—"

And at that very inopportune moment, the phone rang. JJ snatched it off his desk. "Hello?" he snapped into the phone, sounding more like Dee than like himself. "Commissioner, this is _really_ not a good time—" He was silent for a moment before he suddenly shot out of his chair. "I'll get Ryo and head over there." He hung up and looked over at Drake, who was giving him a questioning look. "We have to go."

XXX

Dee had been found among the rubble and rushed to the nearest hospital, which also happened to be twelve blocks from the precinct, so it didn't take long for them to get there.

Ryo couldn't remember ever having been this terrified and this calm at the same time. The moment JJ had gone to find Ryo in the filing room, the moment the blond had heard the news, he'd felt the bottom drop out of his stomach and he became thoroughly convinced that his heart was going to fail right then and there, but now all he felt was the eerie, detached sort of calm that comes shortly after experiencing sheer terror.

The three of them arrived in the waiting room to find it empty except for three people Ryo didn't recognize--a man, a woman, and a little girl who lay cradled and sleeping in the woman's lap.

"I wonder where Mother is…." Ryo observed idly.

"The nun?"

"Yeah…."

JJ shrugged. "Probably hadn't gotten the message yet."

"…I should call her."

"Ryo…are you okay?" Drake asked, noting Ryo's monotone voice.

"I'm fine." Ryo didn't elaborate as he went over to sit in one of the waiting room chairs. He stared straight ahead, zombie-like, and didn't even bother to reach for his cell phone. After a moment, JJ and Drake came to sit beside him.

"Excuse me," the woman Ryo had noticed earlier said quietly. "Are you here for Dee Laytner?"

Ryo's eyes snapped to her, and he nodded. "I'm his…uh…partner."

"Oh. It's nice to meet you. I'm Cecily. This is my husband Mitch and my daughter Robin."

Ryo blinked at her for a moment, the words taking a minute to reach him. "Ryo. Er…Randy. McLean."

"Oh. He…talked about you."

Ryo didn't really know how to reply to that, so he just asked, "How do you know Dee?"

Cecily didn't answer for awhile, and when she did, her voice was very quiet. "He saved my daughter. He saved all of us. He…" Her voice trailed off then, not really knowing what to say. In these sorts of situations, words are seldom useful.

"What happened?"

At that, Cecily looked up, and that was when Ryo really _looked_ at her for the first time. She really was very pretty, but she looked tired and disheveled, and her eyes held a worn, haunted expression. She didn't say anything for awhile, not sure she could talk about anything with someone she'd never even met, but something about this man's face, his eyes…he made her want to tell him everything she felt was wrong in the world.

So she talked. She gave them a complete rundown of that day's events, starting with Dee's arrival at the orphanage and ending with the explosion. Most of it came from what her daughter had told her. The others in the room were listening, as well, but Cecily spoke only to Ryo.

"I…I don't think I'll ever stop having nightmares about tonight. When Robin came running out of the alley by the orphanage…and she was alone… God. I just… Well, she only just got away from the building before it blew. And…I really don't remember anything that happened before the police showed up. I just remember…Dee…"

**-Start Flashback-**

**Cecily stood outside the gates of the collapsed building, watching as police officers, EMTs, and a search-and-rescue team milled around the rubble.**

**Her husband had come and taken their daughter and the rest of the children to find a place that would take them in for awhile. He'd tried to get Cecily to come, too, but she had told him firmly that she would wait to see if the man who had saved their lives would make it out alive. She was numb, in complete shock from the evening's events, and she had absolutely no idea what to do.**

**She had been standing there for a good half-hour before four EMTs followed by the search-and-rescue team came rushing out of the fallen building with two stretchers, one of which carried someone who had clearly not survived the explosion. Cecily hurried over to the other one.**

**On that stretcher lay a young man with black hair and vibrantly green eyes that were currently clouded in pain and confusion. His handsome face was nothing more than a patchwork of cuts and bruises.**

**Cecily really didn't know ****what**** to do, so she asked one of the EMTs, "How is he?"**

"**Not good. Can you tell us what happened?"**

"**The building exploded with him inside. That's all I know. I don't know why he ever came here in the first place."**

"**We asked him that. He said something about…he needed to get 'him' here. We don't know who 'him' is, but that was the last coherent thing we could get out of him. He's conscious, but I don't think he remembers much of anything besides his own name right now."**

"**Will he be okay?"**

"**We don't know, ma'am."**

**Cecily opened her mouth to ask another question, but at that very moment, a hand grabbed her wrist in a very tight grip, and she looked down to see green eyes staring back at her. Those eyes were very clear all of a sudden, as opposed to clouded like they were before. The stretcher stopped moving and Cecily stared expectantly at Dee, who managed to choke out two words. "Save…Ryo?"**

**Cecily stared at him, blinking, trying to figure out how to answer that.**

"**Did…I?"**

**After a moment, Cecily nodded. "You did."**

**Dee relaxed and closed his eyes, and a minute later, the ambulance sped off with him inside. Cecily, after only a moment's hesitation, went to her car and followed it, pulling out her cell phone and dialing her husband's number as she sped off.**

**-End Flashback-**

"I didn't know what to tell him," Cecily said softly, her voice barely above a broken whisper. Her husband laid a comforting hand on her shoulder. "He'd done so much for us. I figured the least I could do was give him some comfort, you know?"

Silence.

It didn't take very much brainpower for Cecily to figure out who Dee had been talking about.

Ryo just stared at the wall in silence as everything fell into place. Dee had finished the case, and hadn't told Ryo anything, because he'd wanted to protect his ex-lover from being killed. He hadn't expected to make it out alive when he'd gone to the orphanage, but he'd gone and stayed there with the children to make sure they got out safely; he kept them there just long enough to make sure that the criminal came and gave Dee a confession. The criminal wouldn't have come if he thought no one was in the orphanage.

But how had Dee gotten the confession? He would have wanted to make sure it got to the police…

"Wait a minute…" Ryo said suddenly, turning to Cecily. His eyes were suddenly very clear with understanding. "Cecily, look in your daughter's pockets."

Cecily stared at the blond as though seriously questioning his sanity, but decided to do what he said. After a moment, she pulled a small, metallic-looking cylinder with tiny wires attached to it, and held it up.

Ryo reached over and took it from her. "Brilliant…"

"What is it?" Mitch asked, speaking for the first time that night.

"It's a wire. Dee must have given it to Robin before he dropped her out the window. He must have gotten the guy's entire confession…"

"What guy? The bomber?"

"Mm-hmm. Dee…stupid, stupid Dee… Will you ever start thinking about yourself?" Ryo said this last part to himself, and JJ and Drake glanced at each other over his head. After a long moment, Ryo sighed loudly. "I can't take this, I have to find out what's going on. I'll be back." With that, the blond stood and went over to the desk nearby, where a woman stood filing paperwork and checking charts. "Excuse me."

The woman looked up. "Yes?"

"I was wondering if you could give me information on a patient here. Dee Laytner?"

"Are you family?"

"Well…no, not exactly, but—"

"I can't give you information unless you're family, Mr…?"

"McLean, and…I'm his partner…er…at work…"

"I'm sorry, Mr. McLean, but—"

"Ma'am, please…"

For the next few minutes, Ryo stood arguing with the woman, until he finally felt something inside him snap. "Look! I have been to this stupid hospital more times than I can count, and a lot of them have been for Dee. He and I have some unfinished business and I can't go anywhere until I know he's going to be okay. So you have some choices here. You can either let me behind the desk to look at Dee's file, or I can do everything in my power to have you fired and removed from behind the desk, then take over your job and _then_ look at Dee's file. Either way involves me getting behind that desk and looking at Dee's file and you really want to end any further conversation with me at this point so once again, _I'm looking for information about my partner, Dee Laytner_."

"Mr. McLean—"

"Excuse me."

Both the woman and Ryo turned to look at the source of the voice, a small, dark-skinned man wearing a doctor's uniform and carrying a clipboard. "Dr. English," the woman said (rather stupidly, in Ryo's opinion).

The man smiled at her. "It's all right, Julia. I'll take it from here. Will you come with me, sir?"

Ryo stared at the doctor, then shrugged and followed him over to where the others stood.

"I assume you're all here for this…Mr. Laytner, as well?"

JJ nodded and stood, as did the rest.

Dr. English looked from face to face, and suddenly he frowned as a look of recognition came into his eyes. "Oh dear God, _again_?"

Ryo blinked. "…Huh?"

"_Another_ 27th cop? Jeez, if we don't quit getting you guys in here we're just gonna move the entire building twelve blocks down… Hell, why don't we just move it into the building? No commute that way… So it's Laytner this time?"

Ryo stared at the man for a moment, then said softly, "Yes, Dee Laytner…"

Dr. English's eyes snapped to Ryo. It wasn't as though Dr. English wasn't used to seeing 27th precinct cops in this hospital, but the tone in Ryo's voice…it was helpless, and it went beyond sadness or worry. It was the voice of a man who truly felt he couldn't go on living if he lost anyone else.

After a moment, the doctor said, "Wait here," and went over to the desk. There, he held a short, quiet conversation with the woman behind it and she nodded, handing him a clipboard, which he brought back over to the group who waited anxiously for him.

"All right, since I didn't start out handling this one, the only info I have comes from what they've already figured out. I'm gonna see about taking over for Dr. Jackson, the guy who's handling Dee, but for now I'll tell you everything I can find. Just…don't mention it to anyone else, okay? It's against hospital policy and even though I always thought it was a stupid policy to begin with…well, never mind." As he spoke, Dr. English was looking at the clipboard. "Ah, here it is. Okay…wow. I'm gonna be honest with you. This…does not look good."

"What doesn't?" Ryo demanded anxiously.

"Well, the overall state of things in the world, for starters, but right now let's just focus on Laytner. He's got a partially collapsed lung, internal bleeding, several broken ribs, dislocations in his left shoulder and knee, two compound fractures in his left arm, and a very serious head injury, as well as shards of glass embedded in half his body. Looks like he didn't quite manage to find cover before the building collapsed. All that…well, after having an entire building fall on your head, isn't as bad as it could be, but it does put him in serious danger. He's in surgery right now to repair the lung and anything else they can operate on, but the head injury still leaves a lot to fate. If he makes it through the surgery well, it all depends on how the head injury heals."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, we can't really ascertain how serious the injury is. We've gotten x-rays and treated him as best we can, but if it doesn't heal well, he could go into a coma, or even if he wakes up, there are a number of problems that it could cause—blindness, partial memory loss, you know. But from what we can tell, the chances of the head injury leaving permanent damage are slim."

"But they're still there."

"Yes, they are."

Ryo sighed. "Okay…thank you, Dr. English."

Dr. English smiled at him. "No problem. Hang in there, okay? I'm gonna go see what else I can find out. Go get a cup of coffee or something, man. You look bushed."

The blond tried to smile, but he was fighting a losing battle. From the moment he heard the words "head injury" he'd felt an unbelievably heavy stone drop into his stomach and he found it very difficult to imagine ever breathing properly again.

As Dr. English walked away, Ryo stared after him for a moment, dazed, before he slowly turned and walked over to the chair he'd been sitting in previously. He sank into it, staring straight ahead, as everyone else took seats around him. Then, sighing, he leaned forward and dropped his face into his hands.

"Er, Ryo?" JJ asked quietly, after awhile.

"Hmm?"

"He'll be fine, Ryo."

"Yeah…" Sighing, Ryo reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell phone. "I really should call Bikky…and Sister Maria…" He sat there staring down at the phone for a minute, thinking, _This is ridiculous. You don't even know what's going to happen to him yet and you're already panicking?_ Logically, his mind told him that. But all he could think was that if anything happened to Dee, half of New York City would drop what they were doing and start to cry.

Because whether Dee wanted to believe it or not, he was loved by everyone at the 27th precinct, all of his friends, Sister Maria, at least fifty orphans, every person he had ever helped while he was doing his job…and Ryo.

If Dee Laytner died, Ryo seriously doubted that he would be able to keep his sanity.

"Ryo?"

"Hmm?"

"You've been holding onto that phone for quite awhile now. Are you gonna actually _call_ anyone?"

"Oh…yeah…"

So Ryo dialed the phone, and held it up to his ear. The other phone rang a few times, and then the answering machine came on, blaring Bikky's loud, obnoxious voice all through Ryo's apartment.

"_Hey, this is Bikky and Ryo. We're not answering the phone because a) we're not home, b) we're too lazy to get up and answer the phone, c) both a and b, or d) we just don't like you. In other words, GET OFF THE PHONE, BERKELEY!" _Here, Ryo's voice issued over the phone. _"Bikky!" _And Bikky continued,_ "Yeah, yeah, fine. Leave a message and we'll get back to you. If you're lucky."_

There was something about listening to that message; it was a symbol of when everything was right, and calm, and…_normal_. Now the entire world had turned upside down and the whole idea that anything had _ever_ been normal completely baffled Ryo.

So when he finally spoke—at least fifteen seconds after the beep had signaled for him to begin his message—his voice shook with pent-up emotion and tears. "Hey, Biks…it's Ryo. This'll…probably be all over tomorrow morning's news, but…well, one of the local orphanages…there was an explosion…and Dee was inside. The doctors, they, uh…they don't know if he's gonna make it. I'll…explain everything later, but…well, I just wanted to let you know. I have to go…I have to call Mother… Bye, Biks."

After he'd called Sister Maria—who, he knew, had immediately dropped whatever she was doing and called a cab—Ryo didn't know _what_ to do. He wanted to make more phone calls, or follow the nurses around begging for information…_something_ besides just sitting and waiting. At last, he settled on the idea that he knew his Dee would always and forever approve of.

"Anyone want some coffee?"

XXX

The caffeine helped Ryo's nerves a bit, but it didn't make him feel any better about the situation. The entire waiting room was completely silent except for the quiet shuffling of people changing positions.

The silence remained until Sister Maria, Bikky and Carol came bursting into the waiting room. Ryo stood up to greet them, and then let out a grunt of surprise as Bikky reached out and hugged him.

"You guys came…" Ryo stated in surprise.

"Of course we came," Carol replied. "How's Dee?"

"The doctors don't know, they haven't told us anything yet. Oh, uh…guys, this is Cecily, Mitch, and their daughter Robin who is obviously asleep. Cecily, Mitch, this is my adopted son, Bikky, and his girlfriend, Carol. And this is Sister Maria. She runs the orphanage that Dee grew up in."

"Oh, we know each other," Sister Maria said when introduced to Cecily. "How are you doing, dear?"

Cecily just smiled tiredly at the three newcomers and shrugged in answer to the question, and Mitch nodded a hello.

"What happened, Ryo?" Bikky asked, sitting down and pulling Carol down beside him. Sister Maria sat down across from Ryo.

So Ryo gave Bikky and Carol a recount of what Cecily had told them, leaving out the part where Dee had asked if he'd managed to save Ryo.

After he finished the story, the entire waiting room was completely silent. They all just sat there for what felt like forever but could only have been minutes, and then Cecily—apparently having noticed that Ryo was looking like he was going to put a hole through the wall—decided to try to take the blond's mind off of his current location. "So…tell me about Dee," she said. Her voice was soft; through all of this, the little girl in her arms hadn't woken up, and the others were trying to keep quiet and let her sleep. "What do you like about him?"

"…What?"

"There's obviously something between you two. What is it that makes you feel the way you do about him?"

Deciding that questioning this woman's perception just wasn't worth the effort, Ryo sighed. "Just…everything." He didn't say anything for awhile after that, but then, a small, loving smile touched his lips, and when he spoke, he wasn't doing it for the others in the room. He was speaking for someone else, someone who he imagined could hear him even from the operating room. "Dee, he's…complicated, but at the same time he's incredibly easy to understand. On the surface he's…loud, obnoxious, overly friendly, lazy, and completely annoying, but…once you get to know him… I don't know, there's just something about him that makes everyone he meets become attached to him and they never want to let go. And he's got his quirks that just make him all the more lovable."

"What kinda quirks?"

"Well… For starters, he always has his clock set at least fifteen minutes fast, so that when the alarm goes off in the morning, he knows it's not really time for him to get up, and he can sleep a little longer. He's a nicotine addict, but he's trying to cut down because he knows Mother and I don't like it. And he likes beer, but his favorite drink in the world is Coke—_not_ Pepsi. He's very specific about his sodas. And his two biggest guilty pleasures are _The Princess Bride_—the movie, not the book—and musicals. You know, _Dirty Dancing_, _Grease_, _Rent_, _The Phantom of the Opera_…the works."

"I _so_ cannot picture Dee watching _any_ of those movies," Carol said, laughing.

"Neither could I, when I first met him," Ryo replied. He didn't laugh, but his smile got a little bit bigger. "But now, it's…I dunno. It's just another part of him."

Cecily smiled and leaned in slightly. "What else?"

"Well, let's see…he's a huge basketball fan—loves the New York Knicks—and he's a video game fanatic. I don't think he ever grew up completely. It's…funny. It used to annoy me. It still does, sometimes, but then he smiles, and it's just…it's Dee."

After a moment, Ryo looked up to see the rest of the room watching him, and he blushed right up to the roots of his hair.

"So…why did you break up, then?" Carol asked quietly.

"To tell you the truth…I don't know. He never told me."

"…I do."

Ryo blinked and turned to look at Sister Maria. "Mother? What…?"

"He told me. Not long after it happened. He said he thinks you don't love him."

"That's ridiculous, why would he think that?"

"He said he heard a phone conversation. Between you and someone else, and he didn't know who it was, but you said you didn't love him."

"What? I…oh."

**-Flashback-**

"**Hey, Bikky," Ryo asked, as he stood next to the sink tossing a salad for dinner. "Is your friend Jason still coming over this weekend? Because if he is I need to find that old air mattress, we've got nowhere else for him to sleep."**

"**Don't worry about it, he cancelled," Bikky replied from his seat at the table. "I guess I forgot to tell you."**

"**Oh. That's a shame, why did he cancel?"**

**Bikky shrugged, his eyes on his math book. "Don't ask me, I don't know."**

"**Don't lie to me, Bikky."**

"**What makes you think I'm lying?"**

**Ryo chuckled and picked up the salad bowl, moving to sit across from Bikky at the table as he continued tossing the salad. "The only time you concentrate that hard on math, and the only time you're ever as quiet as you've been tonight, is when you're avoiding talking to me. Come on, 'fess up, Biks."**

**Silence.**

_**Oh joy, I get to guess**_**, Ryo thought wryly. "Did you do something, Bikky? Because you know what hiding things from me always gets you. It's better if you just confess from the start, and take the consequences. Or do I really need to remind you about last month's fiasco with the shoplifting?"**

"**I thought we agreed not to talk about that anymore," Bikky replied.**

"**Desperate times, desperate measures, and you're avoiding the subject. Now why did Jason cancel? Did you two have a fight?"**

"**Nope."**

"**Is he grounded?"**

"…**Sort of."**

"**How do you 'sort of' ground someone?"**

"**His mother, she…uh…" Bikky paused. He had no idea how he was supposed to tell his father this. Best to just get it over and done with quickly, he supposed, since Ryo didn't seem to be giving up anytime soon. Damn, the guy was perceptive. "She thinks you're a dangerous influence."**

"…**Huh? Why?"**

"**Because you're…uh…well, word has gotten around at school and it got back to some parents, and…"**

"…**Ah."**

"**They're just a bunch of homophobes, Ryo. What do they know?"  
**

"**Enough, it appears."**

**Bikky sighed. "Yeah. Enough."**

"**So…how many others?"**

"…**Pretty much all of them. I don't get it, Ryo. I mean, this is New York City…there are drag queens running around all over the place and no one looks twice at them, but they won't let their kids anywhere near you. Why is that?"**

**Ryo stared at him for a moment, then chuckled.**

"…**What?"**

"**Nothing, just…sometimes I forget how young you still are."**

**Bikky didn't say anything, but smiled slightly when Ryo reached over to ruffle his hair with a grin. "Here, why don't you take your homework to your room and finish it in there? I'll call you when dinner's ready."**

"'**Kay."**

**Ryo's smile disappeared the second Bikky did, and he sighed heavily as he returned to his work. "Damn it all," he muttered to himself.**

**It wasn't until the rest of the meal was cooking and the table was set that Ryo finally went over and picked up the phone. His heart felt heavy and he dreaded the coming conversation, but it had to be done, he figured.**

"**Hello?" the person on the other end said as the phone was picked up.**

"**Hi, is this Mrs. Simon? Jason Simon's mother?"**

"**This is she."**

"**Oh, good. I'm Randy McLean. Bikky's father?"**

**The woman's voice immediately changed to one of those tones that people used when they were determined to be somewhat courteous and still let the person they were talking to know they hated them. "Oh, hello."**

"**Bikky told me that Jason cancelled, and…he told me why. I wanted to call and make sure there's been no misunderstanding. He said Jason cancelled because of me?"**

"**He did, yes."**

"**Would you care to explain that to me?"**

"**I'll be frank, Mr. McLean. I'm not sure I want you around my child. You might give him…ideas."**

"**What sort of ideas, Mrs. Simon?" Ryo asked, forcing his voice to remain pleasant.**

"**Look, Mr. McLean, if you want Bikky to turn out the way you have, that's fine with me. But if he's going to start eying boys with anything more on his mind than friendship, I don't want him doing so around my child."**

**It was all Ryo could do to refrain from ripping the phone out of the wall, but his voice was pleasant—if a little chilly—when he replied, "Ma'am, I assure you, Bikky isn't going to be making any moves on your son anytime soon. And if he does, it will not be because I influenced him somehow."**

"**Oh, really?" Mrs. Simons asked, sounding as though she seriously doubted it.**

**Ryo rubbed his head—he could already feel a headache building. "Mrs. Simon…I'm sure you're concerned because you know that I'm living with another man."  
**

"**I've heard that, yes."**

"**And you think Bikky's dangerous because he lives with us?"**

"**I think you have the potential to be a negative influence on the innocent minds of young children."**

"**So that's a yes?"**

"**Yes, it is."**

**Ryo closed his eyes. This woman was insane (and Ryo was finding it hard to believe that there were people in the world that actually said these things to other people) but her son was Bikky's friend, and since it didn't appear that she was going to become any more enlightened anytime soon, there was only one thing to be done. **

**After a moment, Ryo sighed inwardly and said, "Mrs. Simon, I know you probably aren't going to want to believe this, but…the rumors aren't true. Dee Laytner is just my partner. At the 27****th****. I'm a police officer, and police officers work in pairs. That's what Dee is. The second part of the pair." These next words were possibly the hardest words Ryo had ever forced out of his mouth, but they had to be said. Ryo wasn't going to let his son lose all of his friends. He couldn't. "He's nothing more than a friend and partner. I…don't love him."**

**After that, it had only taken Ryo a few more minutes on the phone to get a full apology and permission for Bikky to see Jason anytime he wanted to. Right after he had hung up the phone, Dee had entered the room, smiled tiredly, kissed him, and sat down to have dinner.**

**He had broken up with Ryo the next morning and moved back to his old apartment.**

**-End Flashback-**

"He must have heard all of it…" Ryo said softly. "I didn't…" Sighing, he rubbed his forehead. "I'm gonna go get some more coffee," he said absently.

"He didn't hear all of it," Sister Maria said suddenly, as Ryo stood to leave.

"…What?" Ryo asked, turning back to look at the nun.

"He didn't hear all of it," she repeated. "He only heard the end. The part where you said you were just his friend and partner and nothing more. The part where you said you didn't love him. My son is very sensitive, Ryo…all of my children are. He needs to feel loved. He didn't think you could give him that. Please…don't blame him, Ryo."

"I don't. I…couldn't." Forcing a small smile, Ryo turned and walked away, leaving the others to sit and wait anxiously for news.

Bikky caught up with him by the vending machine. Ryo smiled tiredly at him, but the boy didn't return the smile. On the contrary, his frown just grew deeper, and his eyes held the stormy quality that was usually directed at the people he hated and occasionally at Dee, but never at Ryo. Until now, apparently. "What's up, Biks?"

"You're an idiot," the boy spat, sounding completely unlike himself.

"…Good to know."

"I mean it, Ryo. Why would you do that?"

"I…thought I was doing it for you. I thought…you would be happy to have your friends back."

"I don't _care_ about them! I hate that you and the pervert…that you guys…I… Damn it, Ryo!"

"Watch your language," Ryo snapped out of habit, but there was no real feeling behind the words. "Bikky, I'm…I didn't realize…I thought you hated Dee!"

"I _do_ hate Dee!" Bikky replied, his tone not fully convinced. "I do…"

Ryo stared at Bikky as the boy rubbed his eyes, and that was when it clicked. Bikky was scared of the exact same thing as he was; he was terrified that Dee would die before he and Ryo had a chance to reconcile. "…Bikky…c'mere…" Ryo said softly, reaching out and pulling his son into a hug. "I'm going to fix this," he assured the boy. "I don't know how, but I will. I promise."

"You'd better," Bikky replied, then stubbornly pulled away.

"I will. Okay, why don't you go back to the waiting room? Send everyone home and tell them I'll call them as soon as we have some news. I'm sure Mother will want to stay and I know you and Carol will, but everyone else needs to go home and get some sleep. And get Cecily and Mitch's number for me, will you?"

"Sure thing."

And with that, Bikky was gone, and Ryo was left to decide how to best set about fixing what he had broken.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Crap, this chapter took a long time to write. I'm sorry it's been so long! But this chapter is longer than my other ones, so I hope you're all happy!

So there you have it. Now you know the reason Dee left. I hope it wasn't an anticlimax, but it seemed like a good enough reason for me. I would have left if I heard that part of a conversation…

I'm gonna try to get the next chapter up much faster, okay? This story's almost done! I know I say that every chapter, but…I think I mean it this time!


	5. Hospitals Get You Thinking

**Chapter 5—Hospitals Get You Thinking**

Ryo sat in the cafeteria of the hospital, a cup of coffee and a sheet of paper on the table in front of him and a pen in his hand. He nervously tapped the pen against the paper and every once in awhile he chewed absently on the end of the writing utensil. Then, at last, he started to write, and after that, the words just flowed.

He had no idea how long it took him to get the letter finished to his satisfaction but he was sure it had been a very long time. After he'd finally finished it, he picked it up and read it over.

_Dear Dee,_

_I know the last thing you were probably expecting when you woke up was a letter from me. I know_…_after all I've put you through, the least I can do is actually visit you in person, right? But_…_I dunno, I just don't think I can do that yet. It's nothing to do with you, it's just the way it is. The way I am._

_I really don't know what to say in this letter_…_ I've never written a letter like it, so_…_ I don't even really know why I'm writing it. It just feels_…_right, you know?_

_Well, I guess the real reason I'm writing this is because it's easier than facing you, but I had to explain to you what's been going on_…_what I was saying on that phone call that made you break up with me._

_Yeah, Mother told me. Don't go off on her until you understand how truly awful this night has been for all of us, okay?_

_But_…_Dee, that phone call_…_it really wasn't what you think. I mean, yes it was, but_…_it was for a different reason than you think._

Then followed a short explanation of the reason behind the phone call that Dee had heard, and about twelve apologies—all written in twelve different ways—before the subject of the letter changed just a bit.

So there you have it. It's no excuse, I know, but…you have to understand that when it comes to Bikky and his happiness…my judgment sometimes gets a little clouded.

_But I know that the reason you broke up with me isn't entirely about the phone call. It's about me, isn't it? I'm_…_I know I've been frustrating, and I know you don't like how embarrassed I am to admit that I'm_…._that I'm gay. (Why was it so hard for me to write that?)_

_I think_…_no, I __know__, that you need someone who will tell you they love you and someone who isn't embarrassed to be with you. But_…_I'm not __embarrassed__, exactly. I'm just_…_insecure, I guess._

_But I'm going to change. If you'll still have me, I'll change. I don't know how long it will take, but I do know you'll be patient. So I'll change. Starting right now._

_I'm not going to be embarrassed to say it anymore. I love you. I haven't said it since that night on the roof, so I'm going to say it now. I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you. I love the way you would hit me when I try to wake you up for work. I love the way you still look at Rose when he starts flirting with me. I love how you're obsessed with musicals but tell everyone your favorite movie is __The Fast and the Furious__. I love the way you used to hold me at night, like if you let go something would snatch me away. I love kissing you and hearing you say you love me. __I love you__, Dee Laytner. And I'll tell it to anyone you want me to._

_I just don't want the last thing you hear from me to be silence. Hospitals_…_get you thinking about that sort of thing, I guess. If you_…_die_…_tonight_… _I don't think I could take it, Dee. I need you with me._

_Please_…_if we all come through this night sane and_…._alive_…._will you come home? Will you come back to me?_

_Okay, that's all I had to say. I'm gonna wrap up this letter and head off to find a doctor and throw questions at him until he's curled up on the floor crying like a little teeny girl. Just seems like the right thing to do at the moment._

_I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you_…_I love you__. Don't doubt that, okay?_

_Do you remember_…_in __The Princess Bride_…_when Westley said "This is true love_…._you think this happens every day?" My sentiments exactly. I miss you, Dee. I love you. Please forgive me?_

_Love,_

_Ryo  
_

_P.S. You have no idea how often I thought of crumpling this letter up and throwing it in the trash, or crossing out half of what I wrote. Sound more like Ryo now?_

_P.P.S. I love you._

Satisfied, Ryo drained the last of his coffee and had just folded the paper and placed it in his pocket when Bikky came rushing into the cafeteria. Spotting Ryo, he ran over to the blond and grabbed his wrist. "I've been looking for you everywhere! Dr. English wants to talk to you."

XXX

Ryo was certain he couldn't get to the waiting room fast enough. Had he been Superman behind the wheel of the fastest vehicle ever to grace a NASCAR track, he couldn't have gotten to the waiting room fast enough.

Dr. English was waiting for them, with Carol and Sister Maria standing next to him, and judging by the expressions on their faces, they hadn't been told anything about Dee yet. They all stood there in nervous, frightened silence for a moment before Dr. English spoke.

"You can all stop looking at me like I'm the Grim Reaper. Laytner's gonna be fine."

Ryo blinked, certain he hadn't heard right. "…Huh?" He had been expecting Dr. English to say a great many things, but not that.

The others wore similar expressions.

Dr. English laughed slightly. "The surgery was successful, and barring any complications, he'll make a full recovery."

"Really?" Bikky asked, trying not to sound like he actually cared, although his voice was rather strangled.

"Really. I mean, he won't be a part of the touring company of _Riverdance_ anytime soon, but he'll be up and around and back to his life after a few months and some intense therapy. I give him to eight months to a year for a complete recovery."

Ryo felt his chest constrict, and he took a deep breath, letting it out in a loud sigh, but he didn't say anything. There was really nothing _to_ say.

"Can we see him?" Sister Maria asked. She looked very pale and more panicked than Ryo had ever seen her, but she was amazingly calm about the entire situation.

"He's still asleep, but you can stay with him until he wakes up. Visiting hours are over but I'll talk to the nurses about letting you stay awhile longer."

"Thank you," Sister Maria replied. Then she gave Bikky a nudge and they all headed toward Dee's room as Dr. English went over to the desk to speak to the woman behind it.

"Er, Mother?" Ryo asked, reaching out to stop the nun as she went to follow Bikky and Carol into Dee's room. "Can I talk to you for a minute?"

Sister Maria looked surprised, but she nodded and motioned for Bikky and Carol to go sit with Dee. Then she turned to Ryo. "What is it?"

"Nothing, I just…I wondered if you could give this to Dee for me? When he wakes up?" As he spoke, Ryo pressed the letter into Sister Maria's hand.

The nun took it and stared down at it, confused. "Ryo, what…?"

"Don't read it, okay? Just…give it to him."

"But…Ryo. Don't you want to—?"

Ryo shook his head sharply. "Not yet. Just…please…give that to him for me?"

"Ryo, I—"

"Mother, please. I think that letter will fix things. I hope. Please give it to him?"

Sister Maria sighed, but nodded. "All right. I'll give it to him." She turned to enter the room, but then turned back suddenly. "Ryo?"

"Yeah?"

She gave him a comforting smile. "Everything will be all right, Ryo. You'll see."

Ryo forced a smile in return and nodded, then turned to go find a pay phone.

XXX

**27****th**** Precinct**

JJ and Drake were back in their office and back to their awkwardness. They had originally gone home, but both had given up on trying to sleep and gone back to get more work done. They had run into each other coming through the door, shared a nervous laugh, and gone in. Things had been completely silent since then.

"I wonder how Dee's doing…" JJ said conversationally after awhile.

"They would have called us if there was any change," Drake replied, staying as far away from JJ as he could.

JJ stood up and walked across the room to the filing cabinet, opening it and pretending to riffle through some papers, when in fact he was studying Drake out of the corner of his eye. He was so busy studying his partner that he wasn't paying attention to his hands, and he dropped half the contents of the drawer on the floor. Cursing, the hyperactive officer knelt and began to gather up the papers. Sighing, Drake sat down and did the same. And then he looked up to see JJ's face right in front of his own, and an intense feeling of déjà vu came over both of them.

"We've gotta stop meeting like this," JJ whispered after a long, tense moment, his face getting closer to Drake's.

"Yeah…"

That was all Drake was able to get out before their lips met.

This time, the detective didn't even think about pulling away, because when the world goes insane, why the hell shouldn't you go along for the ride, right? So the kiss went on passionately and uninterrupted for quite some time until the phone rang.

The two sprang apart. A heated blush started at Drake's face and crept to the rest of his body, and he scratched his head, chuckling nervously. "Sorry, man…"

"Don't be," JJ replied, smiling slightly and standing. "I only wish you'd learned to enjoy it sooner."

"JJ—no, I didn't… That didn't mean… I don't… Damn it, JJ!"

Chuckling, JJ picked up the phone on his desk. "NYPD 27th precinct, this is— Oh, hey, Ryo. Yeah, Drake's here, too, we were just—"

"JJ, don't you _dare_," Drake hissed.

JJ threw him a smirk, but then his face softened into a smile. "So anyway, what's up, Ryo?" He was silent for a minute, then a relieved smile broke out on his face. "Uh-huh. Okay. So tomorrow, then? Okay, see ya then. Bye, Ryo." He hung up the phone and turned to Drake, smiling. "Dee's gonna be fine. Ryo said we can drop by sometime tomorrow to see him. He told coming tonight would be pointless, since it's already so late and Dee probably won't wake up for another couple of hours. Sister Maria's with him now, and Bikky and Carol. And Ryo, of course."

"So what's gonna happen to those two now?" Drake asked, though it was obvious that his mind wasn't on Dee and Ryo's relationship.

"Dunno. Guess we'll find out tomorrow."

"Guess so."

"So should we cut the cute and get right to the nitty gritty?"

"The way you talk is just…wrong, JJ."

"Drake…"

"No, we're not gonna talk about it, JJ. Not now, at least. I just…I need to go home and…think."

"So you're at least gonna _think_ about us, then?"

"N-no! JJ, there is no _us_. I…we…you… NO _US_, JJ!"

JJ laughed and finished putting the papers in the filing cabinet before donning his jacket. "See you tomorrow, Drake."

XXX

Back at the Hospital

Sister Maria knew immediately when Dee finally began to stir. Like the vigilant mother she was, the nun had taken up residence by her "son's" bedside and had yet to move. Ryo seemed to have disappeared, and Carol had dozed off on the room's small couch with her head on Bikky's lap. The boy petted his girlfriend's head absently and studied Dee with a thoughtful look on his face. Both snapped to attention when Dee's head turned and his hand tightened on Sister Maria's.

"Dee?" Sister Maria inquired softly, leaning forward slightly.

"Hmm…hi," Dee replied hoarsely, trying to open his eyes. "I can't move… Damn, these are some good drugs."

Sister Maria and Bikky burst into quiet laughter, and Bikky gently laid Carol's head on the couch and stood to move to Dee's side. "Hey, pervert," he said, his voice lacking its usual scorn. "'Bout time you woke up, ya lazy bastard."

Dee laughed tiredly, and tried to force his eyes open. They resisted but consented to open in the end, and the officer blinked groggily and tried to bring the room into focus. "Is everyone okay?"

"Everyone except you," Bikky replied. "Idiot. You scared u—uh, Ryo to death."

"Huh…? Oh…Ryo…where is he?" Dee asked, the words still slightly slurred with exhaustion.

"He wandered off somewhere," Sister Maria replied. "I'm sure he'll be back soon. Just relax, all right? Everything's taken care of."

"Mmm…'kay…"

XXX

That night, Sister Maria took Carol home and Bikky to stay with her, and Ryo stayed at the hospital. He didn't actually enter Dee's room, but he asked Dr. English for regular updates. Dr. English gave the reports willingly but with a look of confusion, clearly wondering why the man didn't just—oh, what's the phrase?—_go in_. The doctor knew enough to keep his confusion to himself, however.

Sister Maria returned with Bikky and Carol at around ten the next morning to find that Ryo had dozed off in the chair outside Dee's room. Smiling slightly, the nun gently shook Ryo's shoulder, and the blond woke immediately. He smiled tiredly at the three. "I just…wanted to make sure nothing happened to him during the night."

Bikky just nodded and went into the room, and Carol followed him.

"Are you going to come in, Ryo?" the nun asked gently.

Ryo smiled and shook his head. "I'm going to go get some coffee."

"Why don't you go home and get some sleep? Dee's going to be all right, and you've got to get some rest. He's in capable hands, Ryo."

"I know. But…I need to be here."

Sister Maria smiled. "All right. Go get your coffee. We'll be in with Dee."

XXX

Dee seemed in good spirits that day. He still couldn't sit up very well and that irritated him, but he was more alert and even traded a few insults with Bikky.

He was very awake by noon, and Sister Maria deemed it a good time for more serious matters. So she reached into her pocket and took out a small, neatly folded piece of paper.

"What's that?" Dee asked, noticing the nun fiddling with the paper.

"Ryo asked me to give it to you. He told me not to read it, but—"

"Hey, Dee!"

Everyone in the room turned to the doorway, and Dee forced a smile, his mind still on the piece of paper in Sister Maria's hand. "Hey, guys."

JJ and Drake entered and dropped into the last remaining chairs. "How are you feeling, stud?" JJ asked, laughing as Drake looked at him out of the corner of his eye.

"I was just about to read a letter," Dee replied, taking the piece of paper. "So if you could refrain from calling me any cutesy and borderline disgusting nicknames, that'd make it a lot easier to concentrate. So shove it, JJ."

"Yep, Dee's back," Drake said, laughing.

Dee looked down at the paper, apprehensive now, and unfolded it slowly.

The room was silent as Dee read the letter, a small smile touching his lips every now and then. It was just so…_Ryo_. So utterly and thoroughly Ryo. He reread the letter twice, then read the closing lines four times, and at last folded it up. "Hand me my phone, will you, Mother?"

"What's in the letter, Dee? Who's it from?"

Dee ignored JJ and flipped his phone open.

"Dee, what's going on? Who wrote you a letter?"

No reply.

"Dee?"

Dee's finger hovered over the number pad on his cell phone, but he hesitated.

"Why won't you tell me?"

Dee continued to hesitate.

"DEE! PLEASE STOP TORTURING ME!"

_Ah, what the hell._

And he pressed a button.

XXX

Ryo had finally left the hospital to get lunch, but he had eaten very little and was walking back to the hospital when his cell phone beeped. Sighing irritably, he took it out, looked at it, and froze. It was a text message from Dee, with only three words.

_Get in here._

XXX

Back at the hospital, JJ was practically crying as he begged Dee for information about the letter. Having failed in that course of action, he then began trying desperately to find a way to beat the crap out of Dee and take the letter by force without actually killing the severely injured police officer.

The entire room fell silent, however, as a gentle knock came at the door. Then it opened slowly, and Ryo stepped in and closed the door. "Hey…" he said hesitantly, coming over to Dee's bedside.

Everyone in the room was holding their breath.

"Hey," Dee replied softly. "Where ya been?"

"Stop kidding around, Dee. You know where I was."

"In the cafeteria?"

"Where the happy coffee is."

Ryo was standing at Dee's bedside now.

"So, uh…how are you feeling?"

"Like hell. Good painkillers, though…I'm flying about two hundred feet in the air right now. There's just…one thing…one drug that they forgot to give me."

"Huh? Do you want me to go get you a nurse?"

Dee chuckled. "Nope. You're perfectly qualified to give me my meds."

"Huh? Dee, what—?"

Ryo was cut off as Dee's good hand shot out (for a guy who had just gotten blown up, he still had remarkable reflexes) and grabbed his. The next thing he knew, Ryo was falling, and he lips fell against Dee's. Dee suppressed a grunt as Ryo slammed into his recent injuries, but the pain quickly fell away as he pressed his lips to the blond's.

Damn, he had missed this.

"That was…the _worst_ pickup line in the history of the _entire world_," Ryo said softly when their kiss broke.

"Shut up, you," Dee growled lightly, pulling Ryo back in for another kiss.

Sister Maria stood and motioned for the others to follow her out of the room. They did so, and the nun closed the door silently.

"Well, whatever else happens between us, at least we know that works," Dee said, as Ryo pulled away.

Ryo laughed, but his expression was nervous and a little hesitant. "So…"

"Great letter."

"Yeah…"

Silence.

"You know we have to talk about it eventually, right?"

Ryo looked down at the blanket and traced a thread with his finger, opting not to say anything quite yet; he didn't know what _to_ say.

"Why didn't you tell me, Ryo?"

Ryo looked at his hands. "I didn't want you to feel responsible for anything."

Dee blinked, dumbfounded. "You're an idiot, Ryo."

Ryo laughed. "That's what Bikky said."

"Bikky?"

"Yeah. He was…really upset when he found out we'd broken up, but that was nothing compared to how angry he was when he found out why. I think he's still a little mad at me about it."

"Mad at you? Why?"

"_Now_ who's an idiot? He loves you like a father, Dee. He misses you." The blond paused. "We both do."

"Ryo… I swear, if I'd known… I wouldn't have left if…"

"I know. You still would have been mad, though. Not that I blame you. You really…thought I didn't love you, didn't you?"

"Well what the hell was I supposed to think?"

Ryo considered, and suddenly he laughed bitterly. "You're right."

"…Huh?"

"I said it in my letter, but until now, I don't think it really hit me just how stupid I've been lately." Sighing, he leaned in and kissed Dee. "Look, I know we still have a lot to work out, but…when you get out of here…are you coming home?"

Dee smiled, and reached out to stroke Ryo's hair gently. "Yeah. I'm coming home."

A relieved smile stretched across Ryo's face. "Good."

XXX

Outside, everyone but Sister Maria was vying for the prime listening spot at the door and arguing in annoyed whispers.

"Ow!"

"Bikky, that was my foot!"

"Drake, _move_!"

"Damn you, JJ!"

"Get off me!"

"Ow!"

Sister Maria watched with an amused expression on her face, and Dr. English stood next to her. "You people are all insane…." he muttered, fighting his curiosity and telling himself that he, as a medical professional, was above such petty endeavors as this. At last, though, he sighed in defeat and went to listen with them.

"You _do_ surprise me, Dr. English," Sister Maria said, laughing.

At that moment, the hallway erupted in cheers as inside the room, Dee said he would move back in with Ryo.

XXX

For the rest of the day, Ryo and Dee sat there together, uninterrupted except for the occasional nurse and Dr. English. They spent the entire time talking—about their relationship problems, partly, but also about anything and everything that came into their heads—and by the time they ran out of things to say, Dee's eyes were falling closed. In spite of the pain he was feeling and the exhaustion that was singing in every muscle, he was filled with contentment and absolute peace.

"You should sleep, Dee," Ryo said softly.

"Mmm…yeah…"

Ryo smiled. "G'night, Dee." He hesitated, then leaned down and kissed Dee's forehead. "I love you."

"Love you, too…."

XXX

A few days later, Ryo returned to the hospital after work to find Dee sitting up, propped up by a rather large stack of pillows, and reading an issue of _Sports Illustrated_. "I don't think I've ever fully appreciated Rick Riley before now," Dee said, tossing the magazine onto the nightstand. "Dear _God_, I'm bored."

Ryo laughed. "Well, I've got good news. We've got the case wrapped up. The guy you killed was the last of his family, so we've got no worries about any of those lunatics coming back. Cecily told me she and her family have been to see you three times and that Robin won't stop talking about you, so that's good, too. The paperwork's almost done, I've punched Rose twice, and JJ's on this creepy quest for Drake's affections, which is just…weird." He smiled and leaned over to kiss his lover. "Hi."

"Hi. When are you busting me out of here?"

"You haven't even been here a week, Dee."

"I can't help it, I'm _bored_. Hey, come back here." Dee reached out with his good arm to grab Ryo's tie and pulled him in for another deep kiss. "Bikky around?" he asked as Ryo pulled away.

"Yeah, he's—"

"I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING, I SWEAR!"

"Right here, apparently."

At that moment, Dr. English came in, dragging Bikky along by the ear.

"He's doing the ear thing, Ryo, make him stop! Ow, ow, ow!"

"Get this…_monster_ out of my hospital," Dr. English said, trying for a stormy expression and failing miserably. "He's hitting on all the nurses and one of them strong-armed him into a wall."

"Bikky…"

Dee roared without laughter. "Wait till I tell Carol!"

"DON'T YOU DARE, YOU SICK, DEMENTED PERVERT!"

Ryo sighed and rubbed his eyes, feeling a headache building.

"You okay, Ryo?" Dee asked as Dr. English began one of his examinations.

"Huh? Oh, yeah. I'm good. I'm gonna go get some coffee."

"Okay."

As Ryo stepped out the door, he had to laugh as Dee said, "Not sure how comfortable I am with you touching me there, doc." However, he felt a wave of dizziness come over him soon after, and he leaned against the wall.

God, he was tired….

XXX

After Dr. English left, Dee asked Bikky, "So, monkey…is there something wrong with Ryo?"

"Nope. Not that I know of."

"He looks tired."

"Yeah, he hasn't slept much lately. Dunno why. He drops off for a couple of hours every night, but usually he gets up around midnight and started wandering around the house. It's creepy."

"Oh…"

XXX

Bikky went home about an hour later, and Ryo sat at Dee's bedside, trying desperately to stay awake.

"Ryo?"

"Hmm?"

"You need to get some rest."

"What are you talking about? I'm fine."

"No you're not. You're exhausted. You're pushing yourself too hard. You've gotta get some sleep."

"I _have_ been sleeping."

"Liar."

Silence.

"Come on, why haven't you slept?"

"I…can't."

"Why?"

"Nightmares. About…you…not being here anymore…"

Dee looked confused. "What?"

"Every time I close my eyes…I have a nightmare. About the future. One without you in it. And…that scares me. More than I ever would have admitted before."

Dee stared at him for a moment, and he felt a lump come into his throat. But he covered it with a very manly, exasperated sigh. "Come on."

"Huh?"

He moved over on the bed, grimacing in pain, and motioned for Ryo to lay next to him. "Get over here."

"Dee, I dunno…the nurses wouldn't like it…"

"So?"

"And…you're hurt…"

"Ryo, come _on_."

"But…"

"Damn it, Ryo, just get in the godforsaken bed."

Smiling slightly, Ryo lowered himself carefully onto the mattress, stretching out. His aching muscles immediately stopped screaming at him, and he closed his eyes contentedly. Then he turned on his side and rested his arm very gently on Dee's chest, taking Dee's good hand in his own, just needing to have some sort of contact with his lover.

Dee turned his head so that it was buried in Ryo's hair, and inhaled deeply. "Your hair smells like vanilla," he said softly, kissing the top of his lover's hair.

No answer.

Ryo was already asleep.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

So there you go. It was crappy and rushed, but it was there. If no one likes that, maybe I'll go back and write it so it's better. Right now I'm exhausted and my eyes hurt, so I'm gonna go to bed. I think I've just got one chapter left to wrap things up, two at the most. And then this story goes bye-bye and I start another one. Or finish others. Or both. I dunno. God, I'm tired….


	6. Thank God For Dee

Okay, so I confess. I hated the last chapter with a fiery, white-hot passion. It was way too rushed and I don't think it was very well-written, especially the end. But I really don't want to rewrite it… I'm sorry! I'll try to make this chapter better…then I'll make my next _Fake_ fic a whole lot better than this one. I don't know if I really like this one…

Oh, and I need to put in a disclaimer, since I don't know if I put one up to begin with, so…

DISCLAIMER: I don't own it. Never did. If I did, it's be more fluffy…

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

**Chapter 6—Thank God For Dee**

Around midnight, Ryo felt someone gently shaking his shoulder. His mind, however, was exhausted, and refused to register that someone was attempting to awake him. He slowly awoke to see that night had fallen completely around them, and Dr. English was standing next to the bed.

"What time is it?" Ryo whispered.

"Late. You're starting to annoy the nurses."

Ryo chuckled sheepishly. "Sorry."

He started to get up slowly, only to feel an arm tighten around his waist, and he looked down to see Dee holding onto him with a slight frown, even in sleep. Smiling softly, the blond leaned down and kissed Dee's forehead. "It's okay, Dee. I'll be back," he whispered, and the words must have registered in Dee's sleeping brain, because Ryo felt his lover's body relax and Dee sank deeper into his slumber.

His smile growing a little, Ryo untangled himself from Dee's arm and followed Dr. English out of the room.

"What's up?" Ryo asked, pulling the door to Dee's room closed behind him. "Is something wrong?"

"The nurses are after me to kick you out. They say you've been around for too long and you're disturbing the patient. Now, if it were up to me, you could stay here round the clock, but it's not up to me, and the nurses say you have to go."

"But you're their boss."

"Yeah, but see, those ladies are scary."

Ryo laughed, his first real laugh in days. He felt…_good_…right now. "I got it. I'm out of here."

"Okay. See ya tomorrow, man."

"Bye."

XXX

Bikky was asleep when Ryo got home. Ryo peeked in on him and smiled, seeing his son slumbering peacefully, sprawled across his bed and tangled in the blankets with his arms around a pillow. Loosening his tie, he removed his jacket, folded it, and placed it on the back of a chair in the living room, putting his tie and shoes with it, before going to his room to change into something more comfortable to sleep in.

The apartment was deathly silent, and the quiet once again began to press on Ryo.

Sighing, he crawled into bed a few minutes later and pulled the covers up around him, but found that he couldn't sleep.

Every time he closed his eyes, he saw Dee's grave.

Logically, he knew Dee was all right, that he would be back to normal soon, but he couldn't seem to convince that tiny, nightmare-inducing part of his mind that this was true.

He grabbed a pillow and brought it up to his face, closing his eyes and inhaling deeply, trying to convince himself that the pillow somehow smelled like his lover. This did not work, however, and Ryo settled in for a long night of not sleeping.

XXX

The next couple of weeks passed serenely. Ryo spent them tying up loose ends on some of their cases, finishing up the paperwork that seemed to have accumulated from every part of the precinct, and making sure that Bikky didn't destroy all of New York City during his vacation from school. He was sleeping better now, though he still missed Dee and had the occasional nightmare about his lover dying or leaving him.

Dee was making rapid progress in his physical therapy sessions, though he was still not allowed to leave the hospital, much to his dismay. One of the nurses actually threatened to wash his mouth out with soap if he didn't stop cursing every time a member of the hospital staff walked in the door.

He had been a little detached since their breakup and had been less prone to giving Ryo a great deal of affection, but things between the two were beginning to warm back up and get back to normal.

Dee was finally allowed to leave the hospital three weeks after he was admitted. The second Dr. English told him he would be discharged, he grabbed his phone and called Ryo, who immediately agreed to come as soon as he finished his shift.

Ryo showed up at the hospital a couple of hours later, whistling happily. It had been a good day. He'd finished up all of their paperwork, therefore ensuring that when Dee was put on desk duty, he would have minimal amounts of his least favorite job. Berkeley hadn't made a single move on Ryo that day, either, and everything seemed to be going well both at work and at home.

Ryo loved days like this, days on which he felt accomplished and felt as though his life really _was_ where it was supposed to be.

"Hey, Dee," Ryo greeted his lover as he entered the hospital room. "Sorry I couldn't get here sooner. I was about to leave when I got slammed with another round of paperwork. I swear, I think the entire precinct has stopped doing their work because they know I'm around to do it for them. Hi."

Dee laughed. "You look like you're in a good mood."

"I had coffee."

"Ah." Another laugh, and then Dee was pulling Ryo down for a kiss. "Did you come to bust me out?"

"That's _exactly_ what I came to do. I already filled out the paperwork."

Dee was looking much better now than he had three weeks before. The bruises that had previously covered most of his body in an interesting array of greens, yellows, purples, and blues, had nearly faded and the stitches had come out of most of his cuts. His more serious injuries would need more time and therapy to heal, but those would also eventually become just a memory.

The only thing that was currently a huge problem for Dee was the uproar that followed his spectacular rescue of the orphans. The news programs and newspaper articles that had been aired and printed had left their subject distinctly disgruntled.

All in all, though, life was looking up.

None of the nurses were exactly displeased to see Dee go. He was—as they had told him frequently, loudly, and in several languages—the most disagreeable patient they'd ever had the displeasure of taking under their wing. Only one of the nurses seemed genuinely upset to see Dee go, and she was a young, bubbly, idiotic and annoying woman who had nearly started crying when she found out Dee was in love with a man.

And that man was in love with him.

Life really _was_ perfect for some people…

XXX

**One Year Later**

"Hello, freedom!" Dee yelled as he and Ryo stepped out of the hospital and into the sunlight.

Ryo laughed, even as he began to scold his lover. "Dee, the doctor said you still shouldn't over-exert yourself…"

"I know, I know," Dee said, having just jumped into the air with his arms over his head. Hitting the ground, he promptly tripped, and Ryo leapt forward to catch him. Dee smiled sheepishly, holding onto Ryo's shoulder to steady himself. "Okay, maybe that was a bad idea….have to get used to using both legs again, I guess…."

"You were never exactly graceful to begin with, Dee," Ryo replied teasingly.

"Bite me."

Dee had finally gotten the all-clear from Dr. English, and he could not have been happier.

The last year had felt like something akin to hell for Dee.

During the first three months or so, every time he'd had a physical therapy session, he would come straight home to take a painkiller, a fact which he desperately tried—and failed—to hide from Ryo. As time wore on, the therapy became easier and the pain became less, but Dee still had to depend on Ryo for things he normally wouldn't have had to, and while he loved Ryo and was glad the blond cared about him so much, he hated being dependent on anyone for anything. He and Ryo had had several fights about that very fact, and the blond had spent more than one night on the couch in the last few months. (Strange, considering that the apartment, and therefore the bed, belonged to Ryo.)

Desk duty hadn't exactly been a picnic either, and Rose had gone to great pains to remind Dee that Ryo was spending a great deal more time with the Commissioner than he was with his partner. Dee, knowing that neither he nor Ryo had a choice in the matter and that Rose was bound to take advantage of that fact, had assigned JJ and Drake to follow Rose everywhere he went with Ryo—a task which the detective duo had accepted willingly and accomplished well enough that Rose threatened to fire them.

But all that was behind them now. Dee was back to active duty in two weeks, and Dr. English had told him that as long as he didn't experience any more difficulties, he didn't have to take part in any more physical therapy sessions, though he did have to come in for a checkup in a month.

Things between him and Ryo were much better now, as well, with Ryo finally beginning to come to terms with who and what he was, and Dee learning to trust Ryo with his heart and to be patient with the blond's insecurities.

Dee had also received an award for "actions above and beyond the call of duty", though he strongly felt that all he deserved was a reprimand for more profound stupidity than the average human mind could possibly comprehend. He _had_ received an official reprimand from the Chief for performing what the NYPD viewed as "an act of vigilantism," but all the positive publicity that the precinct was receiving had caused the repercussions to be somewhat less than severe.

Ryo, too, had been angry with him for putting himself in such a dangerous situation without so much as telling anyone what he was doing. Dee doubted his lover would ever let it go completely. But Ryo was also immensely proud of Dee, and had told him so once, then proceeded never to mention the entire orphanage "incident" again unless Dee spoke of it first. The whole situation had just been too painful for Ryo, and he didn't like dwelling on the painful memories in his life.

"Drake wants to take us out tonight," Ryo said, slipping his arm around Dee's waist. He had started becoming more comfortable with this sort of thing, and while the thought of kissing Dee in public still caused Ryo to blanch slightly, he didn't hesitate much when it came to simple gestures. Dee was being incredibly patient with him, and Ryo was grateful.

"Huh? Why?" Dee asked, confused.

"Well, he _says_ it's to celebrate you getting back to normal, but we all know it's just an excuse to party and consume ungodly amounts of alcohol. JJ and I are gonna be the designated drivers."

"Whoa, what? JJ's coming?"

"Yeah. You, me, Drake, and JJ."

"Why _JJ_?"

"Because he wanted to come."

"Great," Dee said gloomily. "Now just invite the bastard and the sea hag and it'll be the greatest night of my life."

"Rose and Diana aren't coming, and don't be so dramatic."

"No, seriously! All we need is some dancing penguins and Mary Poppins floating in the corner to bring back the worst two hours of _my_ childhood!"

"How do those two thoughts even coincide?"

"You'd have to be in my head, but there was a track."

"Okay. Whatever. So are we going?"

"Do you want to?"

"Kind of. It sounds like fun, and you and I could use some of that."

Dee let out a sigh that was far too loud and dramatic to be genuine. "Okay. We'll go."

Ryo smiled and put his other arm around Dee, so that he was hugging his lover as he walked. "Thank you."

Dee smiled and slipped his arm around Ryo's shoulder, placing a kiss on the blond's head.

XXX

Drake had been standing at the door of his and JJ's office for the past ten minutes, engaged in a serious internal struggle. At last, after much consideration, he slid the door open and stepped in.

JJ looked up from where he was organizing paperwork on the desk, and smiled happily. "Hi, Drake."

In the last several months, things between Drake and JJ had returned to something resembling normal. JJ had decided to temporarily give up his quest for Drake's affections, much to Drake's relief, and now they were just friends again.

Little did JJ know that during those months, Drake had never stopped thinking about his partner and wishing that he himself wasn't such a coward.

"Hey," Drake said, smiling awkwardly.

"Okay, the people in this place have no idea how to organize their crap, and I have no idea how _I_ got stuck with it, but we've gotta get Ryo back in here fast." JJ looked up again, still smiling. "Why are you just standing there?"

"I need to talk to you," Drake replied softly.

"Ooh, spy voice, cool," JJ teased, turning his back to the desk and leaning against it with his arms crossed.

"Focus, please."

"I am a camera."

Drake chuckled quietly, but still looked uneasy.

"I was doing some thinking last night."

"Okay, right away, bad."

"No, it's nothing bad. It's just… God, I suck at this whole talking thing."

"No guy is really good at talking. Just try. I promise, if you revert to caveman speak, I won't laugh. Much."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence."

"Okay, I'll shut up."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome. Now what's up?"

"Well, like I said, I was doing some thinking last night, and I realized…you were right."

"I was…right?"

"Yup. All along."

"Okay, I'm gonna need you to fill in some blanks here, because I'm not following."

"There _is_ something between us."

JJ's eyes widened slightly. "Oh."

"Yeah. But I don't know how to do this sort of thing."

"So you've said."

"But this whole thing with Dee… I know it's been months, and I know you probably aren't interested anymore, but… I still think about the whole thing with Dee and Ryo a lot. Dee almost dying…before Ryo could…well, get a life, to be blunt. And…that thought bothers me. I just don't want anything to happen to _us_ before… It's just such an unpredictable job, JJ, and—"

"I get it."

"So…what do we do now? I don't—" But Drake was cut off when something slammed into him, and his arms were suddenly full of a squealing, laughing JJ.

XXX

"Remind me again why I agreed to this?" Dee said as he and Ryo entered the bar.

"Because you love me?"

"And because I'm alcohol deprived."

"I wouldn't have gotten rid of all your beer if you hadn't tried to mix it with your painkillers."

"One time, Ryo. _One time_."

"Hey, guys!"

Dee and Ryo turned to see Drake waving them over to the bar. Smiling, they went over to sit next to him.

"Hi, stud," JJ said, leaning around Drake as he sipped from a tall glass of lemonade.

"Don't call me that," Dee snapped, then yelled at the bartender, "Hey, thirsty people here! I need beer."

"You get crabby when you're alcohol deprived," Ryo observed.

As the night wore on, Dee and Drake grew more intoxicated, and JJ and Ryo tolerated them good-naturedly.

"C'mon, have a drink, Ryo," Drake urged, taking another drink of his tequila.

"No thanks," Ryo replied firmly.

"Aw, you're no fun."

"No, believe me, he's doing us a favor," Dee interjected. "Two beers and he's doing a _Coyote Ugly_ bar dance to 'It's Raining Men'."

"I'm gonna _kill_ you, Dee Laytner."

"No you're not."

"Yes I—"

"Okay, in order to prevent any homicides," Drake interrupted, "JJ and I have an announcement."

JJ choked on his lemonade and spluttered, "What? _Now_?"

"Why not?"

"But…you said you didn't want anyone to know."

"But _you_ want people to know."

"…But—"

"JJ, take advantage of the five gallons of alcohol in my system, because this is probably the last chance you're gonna get for a really long time."

JJ grinned. "Drake and I are dating!" he squealed, then covered his mouth and looked apologetically at Drake. "Sorry."

Ryo blinked. "You…_what_? Drake, you're…"

"Apparently."

"Oh my… Er…congratulations? I think?"

"Hey, I say we celebrate!" Dee exclaimed. "Shots?"

Ryo groaned. "Oh dear God…."

XXX

The next morning, Dee was the last to stumble into his and Ryo's kitchen.

Drake and JJ had come home with Dee and Ryo the night before and ended up falling asleep on the couch. Drake was now sitting at the kitchen table with his head in his hands, and Ryo and JJ were chattering happily as they made breakfast. The smell of sizzling eggs and frying bacon made Dee's stomach churn, and he flopped into a chair next to Drake, folded his arms on the table, and dropped his head into them.

"Morning, Dee," Ryo greeted him cheerfully.

"Bite me."

"Got anything else to add to that?"

"Yes. Four people called last night and asked that you bite me."

"You look worse than I thought you would this morning."

Dee lifted his head high enough to rest his chin on his arms and shot Ryo the best death glare he could under the circumstances. "Die."

"Aww, poor Dee. Want some breakfast?"

"Die twice."

"What about some coffee?"

Dee perked up slightly. "I love you, Ryo," he said pleadingly.

Ryo chuckled and set a cup of black coffee in front of Dee. "There you go. One bag of coffee per cup of water, just like you like it when you're hung over." The blond turned back to the stove and then set two plates of pancakes in front of Dee and Drake.

"Oh thank God, hangover food," Drake said, picking up a fork and taking a bite.

"That's my little New Yorker," JJ said, smiling and ruffling Drake's hair affectionately.

"Oh my God," Dee said, having just taken a small bite of his pancakes. "I think I'm gonna be sick." He paused as he finished chewing slowly and swallowed. "Nope, I'm good," he reported after a moment. "Oh, my head…"

"Did you take some aspirin?"

"Aspirin?"

"White pill, big 'A' on it?"

"Right. Yup."

JJ and Ryo chatted away all through breakfast, and by the end of the meal, Dee and Drake were on the verge of killing both of them. When JJ began to sing Broadway songs at the top of his lungs, Dee snapped.

"JJ, the only sound I wanna hear from you right now is you screaming, 'Oh God, oh God, please stop beating me to death with my own rib bones!'"

"Aw, don't be so mean, stud."

"Drake, how attached are you to your boyfriend's limbs?"

"Not that attached. Rip them off as you see fit."

Ryo laughed and stood, putting his dishes in the sink. "Okay, JJ and I are going to work. We'll see you guys there, okay?"

"Can you cover for me today?" Dee asked, having just dropped his head back onto his arms again.

Ryo's eyes narrowed dangerously. "Excuse me?"

"…See you at work, Ryo," Dee said meekly.

"That's better."

XXX

An hour later, Dee and Drake came into the precinct looking reasonably awake after having taken more aspirin than it was previously thought humanly possible to ingest.

Dee's nerves were already on edge from his headache, so when he arrived in his office to find Rose and Ryo in a…compromising position against the desk, he very nearly lost it. Launching himself at Rose's back, he yelled, "HOW DARE YOU TOUCH MY RYO THAT WAY?!"

Ryo sighed in relief and slumped back against the desk.

Thank God for Dee.

XXX

"God, I can't wait to get off desk duty," Dee muttered, scribbling down a last note on one sheet and moving on to the next. As he raised his pen to put it on the paper, he suddenly dropped his hand heavily onto the desk. "Oh, Ryo. Something very dark is happening here. It's suddenly heavy as lead."

"Dee, get back to work."

"I see dead people…"

"Dee, _focus_."

"Ryooooo…" Dee whined. "My hand hurts."

"Well my head hurts," Ryo snapped irritably. "So suck it up and take it like a man."

Dee didn't say anything for a moment. It seemed that he wasn't the only one who was getting bored with paperwork. Things were getting dull at the 27th…

Sighing inwardly, Dee dropped his pen onto the desk and stood. He went up behind Ryo and, placing his hands on the blond's shoulders, began to rub them in gentle, steady massaging motions. Ryo sighed contentedly and slumped, resting his head on the desk. Dee chuckled. "You're really tense, Ryo… When was the last time you actually took a minute to relax?"

"It's been awhile," Ryo replied. "Ooh, right there…"

Dee frowned and started to work on a particularly stubborn knot in his lover's shoulder. "I think you're working too hard, Ryo."

"Jesus, Dee, I'm not an old man. I can handle hard work."

"No one can handle this kind of workload, Ryo, not even you. You get up at the crack of dawn and don't get home until midnight most days. Why are you working so hard? All we've done lately is paperwork, anyway."

Ryo sighed; he was too relaxed to try to think up a convincing lie right now, so he settled on the truth instead. "When we were broken up…"

Dee stiffened slightly. He and Ryo had stopped talking about that; neither of them felt like reliving that particular period in their relationship. "Yeah?" he prompted hesitantly.

"I dunno…I worked every second of every day because it was the only way I could stop thinking about you. Guess I never really slowed down again."

Dee smiled slightly. He didn't say anything, but just kept gently rubbing Ryo's shoulders. He lost track of time, but luckily no one bothered them, and Dee only stopped the massage when he heard Ryo's breathing even out. Smiling, he leaned down to place a gentle kiss on the top of Ryo's head, then carefully removed the pen from Ryo's hand and went back to his desk to finish the rest of the paperwork.

In his sleep, Ryo smiled. Thank God for Dee.

XXX

"God, I'm exhausted," Dee sighed, tossing his jacket and tie onto the couch. "My hand cramped up about halfway through the O'Keefe case and it's been spasming ever since… _How_ did all the paperwork pile up like this?"

Ryo laughed as he took Dee's jacket and hung it neatly in the hall closet next to his own. "It's always been this bad. You just started noticing."

"Well I have a new respect for you," Dee said, reaching out and grabbing Ryo's wrist. He spun the blond around and pulled him into a kiss. Ryo wrapped his arms around Dee and deepened the kiss, and to his surprise, Dee was the one that broke it. "Where's Bikky tonight?"

"At Carol's…"

Dee grinned. "Good." Then he pulled Ryo into another kiss.

"Dee…" Ryo said, breaking the kiss. "I don't think I can stay awake that long…"

Dee laughed. "Don't worry. I'm not planning on jumping you. C'mon." He turned and took Ryo's hand, leading him into their bedroom, where he threw himself onto the bed and pulled Ryo down next to him. Ryo leaned over and gave him another long, slow kiss, then said softly, "I'm gonna go change, okay?"

The blond stood and went into the bathroom, grabbing his pajamas from the closet as he went.

A moment later, Dee dragged himself out of the bed and changed into a pair of sweatpants, dropping the rest of his clothes onto the floor. Ryo saw this as he came out of the bathroom, and sighed, picking them up and dropping them into the basket of dirty clothes by the door. Then he crawled back into bed and settled next to Dee, resting his head on his lover's chest. Reaching down to take Dee's left hand in both of his, he began to rub it in deep massaging motions. Dee sighed happily and settled deep into his pillows, feeling his eyes flutter shut. "Reward for earlier, I'm guessing?"

"Yep."

"God, Ryo, this goes way beyond writer's cramp…this is deep pain…"

Ryo brought the hand he was massaging up to his lips and kissed it gently, then rested his head back on Dee's chest and continued rubbing the black-haired man's hand.

"Dee?" he asked thoughtfully after a moment.

"Hmm?" Dee asked sleepily.

"Did you…ever imagine we'd end up like this?"

Dee wrenched his eyes open with difficulty and looked down at Ryo. "Like what?"

"I dunno, I was just thinking…" Ryo sighed and dropped Dee's hand. "Why in God's name did you stay with me this long?"

Dee frowned. "What do you mean?"

"It's just…I've had so many issues, you know? I still have some of them… How does someone like you put up with someone like me?"

"…People do crazy things when they're in love, I guess."

Ryo smiled and rolled over so that he could rest his chin on Dee's chest and looked at his lover. "In love, huh?"

"Happens to the best of us."

Ryo chuckled and leaned up to kiss Dee gently, then settled back into his former position, smiling as he listened to his lover's heartbeat. "I love you."

Dee buried his face in Ryo's hair and smiled contentedly. "Love you, too."

Dee fell asleep a few minutes later, his arms holding Ryo in a tight embrace. As the night grew deeper, Ryo moved impossibly closer to Dee's side, and as he began to drift off, he smiled to himself.

Thank God for Dee.

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Okay, I typed this all up at two in the morning and I'm exhausted, so there's probably a lot of typos. But the story is finished. I'm gonna go write more fics now… No, not now. Tomorrow. I am going to bed. You can review now. Please?


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